


Beauty and the Geek

by socialriotbitch



Category: the GazettE
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - High School, Anal Sex, Drug-Induced Sex, First Time, Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Minor Violence, Narcotics, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Oral Sex, Swearing, Underage Drinking, Underage Drug Use, Underage Sex, use of birth names
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-25
Updated: 2016-10-25
Packaged: 2018-08-24 13:16:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 12
Words: 40,827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8373610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/socialriotbitch/pseuds/socialriotbitch
Summary: Suzuki Akira was the most popular kid in school. Everyone loved him. Especially the girls. He was constantly invited to parties, social gatherings and whatnot. He had kissed almost every girl within a radius of ten miles, and fucked over half of them. Everyone thought he was the luckiest guy in the world.
Except Akira himself.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was one of the first longer fics I ever wrote (back in 2013), and I'm not going to pretend it's particularly good, but I'm reposting it here anyway. It may be the most cliché fic I've ever written, but maybe someone has high school AU as their guilty pleasure, so you know what? Enjoy. Additional warning for use of birth names.

Suzuki Akira was the most popular kid in school. Everyone loved him. Especially the girls. He was constantly invited to parties, social gatherings and whatnot. He had kissed almost every girl within a radius of ten miles, and fucked over half of them. Everyone thought he was the luckiest guy in the world.

Except Akira himself.

The thing was, in the midst of all the partying, hanging out and otherwise taking care of his reputation, there was little time for homework. He could keep up with most subjects, but there was one tiny little thing that he just couldn't seem to do. Maths.

No matter how hard he tried, he didn't understand shit. There were too many numbers, too many symbols, too many complicated words that Akira just couldn't wrap his head around. Thus, Akira got an F in maths.

Naturally, his parents weren't happy about this at all. One day, when they were having dinner together, his father decided to drop the bomb on him.

“Akira, you're 18. It's your last year of high school. If you can't get at least a D in maths by the end of this year, you are no longer our son.”

Akira dropped his chopsticks and just stared open-mouthed at his parents. Were they serious? Would they actually disown him?

“Mother, do you agree with this?”

Akira's mum looked extremely uncomfortable, but when her husband glared at her, she quickly answered “I support your father's decisions no matter what.”

“Is that so?” Akira abruptly stood up, knocking his chair over. “I'll show you!”

Without as much as a bow, he ran out the front door and all the way to the nearest park, where he sat down on a bench and hid his face in his hands. Without his parents' financial support, there was no way he'd be able to afford food, much less an apartment. He'd be doomed.

Akira _had_ to pass. End of story.

~

Flipping through his books, the realization was slowly dawning on Akira that there was no way he was going to pass maths on his own. The numbers simply didn't compute in his head. He didn't understand anything, and he wasn't going to either, unless he could get someone to help him.

The problem was, who?

The teachers didn't have time, and frankly, Akira didn't think they would even care. If he asked any of his friends, he could seriously damage his reputation. If anyone at school found out he was spending his free time studying mathematics, he would be stamped as 'geek' for the rest of his life. He couldn't risk that.

Just as he was about to leave the library and stomp his way home to google 'how to do maths', Akira heard the creaking of the door being opened and then closed. _Shit_. If anyone found him in the library-

Akira didn't have time to panic, however, as he saw who had just entered. A short boy with messy brown hair, thick-rimmed glasses and a bookbag slung over his shoulder. Akira knew who it was despite never having talked to him before.

Matsumoto Takanori was Akira's polar opposite. Nobody liked him, he was bullied by almost everyone and had never even kissed a girl. Rumours had it that the reason was that he was gay. He was basically the school's biggest loser.

But right now, he might be Akira's saviour. The kid was a genius. He aced every subject he had, including maths. If this was a manga, there would be a lightbulb above Akira's head right now, because he had the most brilliant idea he'd had in a long time.

Takanori was perfect. He was the last person in the world Akira expected to tell his friends that he was studying maths. All he had to do was offer Takanori a good deal, maybe pay for his glasses or tidy his room, and he would help him pass.

Akira had no idea how wrong he was.

Stuffing the book back into his bag, Akira walked over to where Takanori was sitting and reading. He grabbed a chair and sat down opposite Takanori, looking at him with the gentlest smile he could muster and clearing his throat. “Hi.”

Takanori raised his head from his book, and the pure loathing etched on his face caught Akira off-guard, and the smile fell from his face. “What the fuck do you want?”

Okay, that was totally unexpected. “Dude, what have I ever done to you?”

“You mean except stood by and watched as I've been beat up by countless of your friends, helped them throw my books in the container, laughed at me and called me stupid names?”

Akira flinched and looked away. For a second, he actually regretted doing all that. “Yeah, I'm sorry about that.”

Takanori raised an eyebrow at him and leaned his head on his hand. After several seconds had passed, during which Takanori was still glaring at him and Akira was starting to feel very uncomfortable, Akira realized that he hadn't answered Takanori's first question yet. “I was wondering if you could help me with something...”

At first, Takanori's jaw dropped and he just stared incredulously at him. Then he threw his head back and roared with laughter. “You, Suzuki Akira, the hottest, most popular guy in school, needs help from me, Matsumoto Takanori, the biggest loser?” Takanori continued laughing, and Akira knitted his eyebrows together in frustration.

“You don't have to be rude, I'm trying to be nice here-”

“Cut the crap. A guy like you doesn't just ask a guy like me for help unless it's something serious. Let me guess, your parents are pissed 'cause you can't pass some subject or something and you need my help so you don't get thrown out on your ass?” Damn. The guy really was smart.

“So what if I do?”

Takanori stopped laughing, watching Akira cautiously as if he expected him to jump at him any minute. “And what the fuck makes you think I would do that for you?”

Akira started fiddling with his belt. Clearly, he hadn't thought this through. He hadn't exactly given Takanori a lot of reasons to be nice to him in the past. “I could do you a favour in return? Walk your dog, do the dishes, something like that?”

Takanori started laughing again, and it was starting to irritate Akira. He huffed and crossed his arms over his chest, glaring at Takanori while he roared like a hyena. “Oh, this is just too good! The way I see it, if you don't pass, you'll be thrown out on your sorry ass, right?”

Akira nodded in confirmation.

“And you can't ask anyone else because that would damage your precious reputation, right?”

Akira nodded again, not liking where this was going.

“So you want, no, you need me to help you improve your grades without telling anyone about it, am I right?”

“Well, yes, but I don't quite see your poi-”

“All right, Suzuki. I'll help you pass.”

Akira's face lit up in an instant. “Really? Thank you so much!”

Takanori held up one finger in the air, and Akira stared at it while he waited in suspense.

“On one condition.”

“Anything.”

“You're going to be my boyfriend.”

Shrieking in horror, Akira knocked over the chair and fell back with a pained grunt. “WHAT THE FUCK?!”

“You might have heard the rumours before, Suzuki, and I'll confirm them for you. I'm gay. I'm a faggot. I like fashion, I like guys and I like dicks. Simple as that. You're in desperate need of a tutor. I'm in desperate need of a boyfriend. It's only fair game.”

“But I'm not gay!” Akira started defending himself, only realizing after he had said it how stupid it sounded.

“I know. Which is why this will be perfect payback for how you and your friends have made my life in high school a living hell so far. You're going to do all the cliché romantic things. Hold my hand in public, take me out on dates, make out with me in the parking lot-”

“No way. No fucking way!” Akira had managed to get back on his feet, and he was now staring in horror at Takanori, who was smirking up at him. Akira really didn't like that smirk.

“Do you really have a choice, Suzuki? You can either say bye-bye to your parents' money, or you can be my boyfriend. It's as simple as that.”

“Why do you even want to do this to me?”

“I already told you; it's the perfect revenge. With you as my big, strong boyfriend, I doubt anyone would dare lay a hand on me any more. I'd be safe from bullies, at least until you graduate. And besides, face it Suzuki, you're the hottest guy in school. I certainly wouldn't mind making out with you.” Takanori licked his lips to finish off his sentence, and Akira was starting to believe that Takanori was the devil himself sent to punish him for being such a lazy asshole.

“I'd rather have my friends think I'm a geek. I think I'll just ask them in stead.”

“Go ahead, Suzuki, but do you really think any of those meatheads would be able to teach you a thing? Or willing, for that matter?”

Takanori had a point. None of Akira's friends passed mathematics, and none of the people who did would want to spend their free time tutoring him.

“Is there really nothing else I can do? I can get people to stop bullying you in some other way. I can find you a boyfriend from nearby. Anything but... that.”

“Sorry, pretty boy, but I don't think so. I have you right where I want you.”

A few long, difficult minutes followed, during which Akira weighed all his options in his head. In the end, he came to the conclusion that if he was going to pass maths, he would have to agree to Takanori's terms.

Just the thought of it made Akira's gut churn. He wasn't gay. He'd been brought up to think that gays were infectious fairies who would rape you if you went anywhere near them. So far, he'd been going to the same school as Takanori for almost two years, and he had neither been raped nor 'turned', as they said. Thus, he was forced to believe that gays weren't exactly like his parents had told him. Besides, Takanori didn't quite fit into the gay stereotype. He didn't wear high heels, or sequined pink outfits, or huge feather boas. All that prompted Akira to believe that maybe, just maybe, gays weren't as bad as he'd thought them out to be.

And he had no idea why or how, but in the end, Akira decided that this was his only option. “Deal.”

“Really? You sure?” Takanori obviously wasn't going to just let this pass without teasing him for it, and honestly, Akira didn't blame him.

“Absolutely.”

“You'll have to act all lovey-dovey and infatuated around me.”

“I understand.”

“You'll have to touch me. A guy.”

“I know.”

“You're going to have to kiss a guy. In front of all your homophobic friends.”

“I get it already!” Akira snapped, and Takanori chuckled to himself, beckoning for Akira to sit down again.

“Fine. So, to start off, what subject is it you need my help with, and what parts of it do you understand?”

Sighing in defeat, Akira fell down on the chair and dug his book out, opening it on page one. He might as well get this over with....

~

Akira really didn't want to go to school today, he realized as he sat on the bus, listening to music and gazing out of the window. Going to school meant seeing Takanori, seeing Takanori meant he had to act... gay. To start with, Akira didn't know the first thing about being gay. All the stereotypes he'd been told about homosexuality were clearly wrong, as Takanori fit into none of them. Secondly, Akira was piss scared that his friends would find out. At the very least, they'd stop being his friends. Worst case scenario, they'd start bullying him as well.

When the bus pulled up to the school, Akira wanted nothing more to just chain himself to the seat and stay right where he was until they reached the end station, which was at the other end of the city. But he knew that if he did, his deal with Takanori was off, he'd fail maths, and he'd be thrown out on his ass before he could even come up with a decent excuse.

It didn't help in the least that Takanori was already waiting in the parking lot, waving at him when he stepped out of the bus. Akira pulled his hood over his face. Maybe this way, nobody would recognize him...

His plan crumbled to dust as Takanori walked right up to him and pulled his hood off, kissing his cheek and grabbing hold of his hand. Akira froze on the spot, his hand tightening around Takanori's so hard it must have hurt. If it did, Takanori didn't let it show, and he leaned up to whisper in Akira's ear.

“Act natural. Pretend I'm just one of your girl flings.”

As simple as that sounded, Akira found it incredibly hard to act as if nothing was wrong while Takanori was still holding his fucking hand like that. It was innocent, it was cute, it was just like what any girl would with their boyfriend, but somehow, it made Akira feel uncomfortable and vulnerable, and he wanted nothing more than to punch Takanori in the gut.

A couple students had seen Akira and Takanori standing in the parking lot, holding hands like a couple, and they stuck their heads together and started whispering. Akira noticed and yanked on Takanori's hand, pulling him behind the nearest bush and nearly hissing at him.

“What the fuck, Takanori?!”

“Calm your straight feelings down, Suzuki. It's just hand-holding. Even friends do that.”

“Girlfriends, yes! Not dudes!”

“Well, you better get fucking used to it. This is nothing compared to how normal couples act in public. And believe it or not, Suzuki, until you get a D in maths, we are a normal couple. In every sense of the word.”

“Except we're both guys!” Akira whined, and Takanori narrowed his eyes at him.

“Yeah, that's how homosexuality works. You're just going to have to suck it up or find yourself another tutor.”

Akira pulled at his hair in frustration, but Takanori shut him up before he could even say anything.

“I get how uncomfortable this makes you, even if I think you have no reason to be, but the thing is, Suzuki, we're a couple now whether you like it or not, and unless you start fucking pretending, then I'm going to have to call the deal off.”

It took all of Akira's willpower to not punch Takanori right then and there. In stead, he took a deep breath, grabbed Takanori's hand, and started walking towards the school. “Fine. You're absolutely evil, you know that?”

“Yep,” Takanori replied, lacing his fingers with Akira's and stroking his thumb over Akira's hand absent-mindedly.

Akira could feel the stares boring into his back as he walked to the entrance, hand in hand with Takanori. He followed him all the way to his classroom, where Takanori kissed his cheek again and left Akira standing there like an idiot, trying to convince himself that he wouldn't burst into flames.

After a long while of just standing there, Akira managed to shake it off and start walking towards his own classroom. Even though all rational thought told Akira he had the right to be, Takanori was still being an asshole. He was making Akira uncomfortable on purpose as some sort of petty revenge, and Akira didn't like it in the least. He was acting like a total dick just to see Akira squirm.

Akira was grateful that his bus was one of the earliest. There was a slight chance that none of his classmates had noticed him with Takanori earlier. Even if they did, Akira decided that it didn't matter. He was still the goddamn king of this school, and nobody could take that away from him. If they tried, Akira would just beat them up and prove to everyone that he was still the same badass Akira as he had always been, the only difference being that now he had a boyfriend.

Class was a nightmare for Akira. He was feeling horribly self-conscious, and he thought he felt people staring at him all the time. Whenever someone started whispering, he'd sharpen his ears and try to make out what they were talking about. He was on eggshells the entire class, scared shitless that anyone had seen him with Takanori.

However, when class was over and Akira could draw a proper breath again, his friends came up and greeted him like usual, and apparently they didn't know anything. Yet.

“Hey Aki, you came to school after all? I thought you were gonna ditch today?” Akira's best friend, Shiroyama Yuu, had just plopped down on Akira's desk as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

“Nah, I wanted to see you guys in stead,” Akira lied, smiling at his friend.

“Something wrong, Aki?” Another friend of Akira's, Takashima Kouyou, slung his arm around Yuu's shoulders and quirked an eyebrow at him. “You looked kinda stressed the entire period.”

“Just tired, I guess.” Shit shit shit. They hadn't noticed anything, had they? Could you tell just by looking at them that people were gay? _Calm down, Akira, just calm down. You're not gay. They haven't noticed anything_.

“We're gonna go beat up some juniors for lunch money, wanna join?” Kouyou was looking at him expectantly, grinning like a cat, and all it did was make Akira more uncomfortable.

“Actually, I've got some stuff to do, so you'll have to have fun without me.”

Yuu and Kouyou stared at him disbelief, before Yuu decided to speak up “You must be really tired. Go take a nap or something, baby.”

Realizing it was meant as a joke, Akira laughed and punched Yuu in the shoulder. “Shut up, asshole!”

Waiting until his friends were long gone, Akira sneaked out of the classroom, hoping he could find a place to hide before-

“There you are, sweetheart!” Takanori seemed to just magically appear behind him, and Akira almost jumped into the air in sheer surprise.

“Fuck! Don't scare me like that!”

“I missed you!” Takanori said in a voice that was so sugary sweet Akira was about to throw up.

“What do you want?” Akira snapped, glaring at Takanori.

“Is that any way to talk to your boyfriend?” Takanori leaned against Akira's chest, and with the height difference, his hair tickled Akira's nose.

Right. Boyfriend. Right. Takanori had a point, that really was no way to talk to the guy you were supposedly in love with, and Akira swallowed thickly, wrapping his arms around Takanori's waist and trying to remain calm. Reminding himself that if he blew this he would be disowned by his parents and practically doomed, Akira tried to pretend Takanori was a girl. The image that popped into his head was even more creepy than the way Takanori was acting, and Akira quickly discarded it.

“How was class?” Takanori asked, still leaning against Akira in a way that could have been considered cute if he had been a girl.

“I don't know. Wasn't paying attention.”

“Tsk tsk, Suzuki, what will happen to your grades if you don't pay attention in class?”

Akira glared at Takanori, not missing the teasing tone in his voice. He was, however, distracted by the sound of gasping not far away. Turning his head to the side, Akira went wide-eyed in horror as he saw that several of his classmates were staring incredulously at him and Takanori, and panic washed over him.

“It seems we've gathered an audience, darling,” Takanori chuckled, clearly amused by Akira's distress. Instinctively, Akira tried pushing Takanori away from him, but Takanori was surprisingly strong. He grabbed the front of Akira's shirt, dragging him down and pressed his lips to Akira's.

No matter how hard Akira tried to push away, Takanori was stronger than him, and he was moving his lips against Akira's sensually. When Takanori finally let go of him, Akira turned to look at his classmates, who just stood with their mouths wide open, none of them saying as much as a word. Takanori managed to snake an arm around Akira's waist, waving at the students at the other end of the hallway with a bright smile. “Hi.”

As if on cue, Akira's classmates hurried around the corner, trying to get as far away as possible. Akira didn't blame them. What irritated him the most was that Takanori seemed to find it hilarious, and was now laughing so hard Akira thought he would burst.

“Oh my, Suzuki. You stole my first kiss and probably ruined your entire reputation in a matter of seconds.”

“That was your first kiss?”

Takanori only laughed even more. “If that's what concerns you the most, then maybe you really are gay.”

Akira slammed Takanori into the wall, staring at him with a murderous look. “Shut the fuck up.”

“Touchy. Relax, I believe you when you say you're straight. However, I don't think your classmates will any more.”

Shit. He was right, wasn't he? It was only a matter of minutes before the whole fucking school knew. Akira had just kissed a guy. In front of several of his classmates. Could it get any fucking worse?

Just then, the bell rang, signalling the start of next period, and Takanori hurried off to class. Akira had no desire to stay in school any more, and he swooped in through his classroom, grabbed his bag and ran off to the toilets, shutting himself in there until he no longer heard any sound from the hallways. Peeking around every corner on his way out, he left the school building as fast as he could, not even bothering to wait for the next bus, instead just running all the way home.

Akira had barely even unlocked the front door when he felt his phone vibrating in his pocket. He kicked off his shoes and fished it out, finding a text from Yuu.

“What the FUCK, man?!” Akira winced, but forced himself to keep reading. “They're saying you fucking kissed that fag-kid, Takanori or something. You gay dude???!!!”

Akira didn't even want to reply. He stuffed his phone back into his pocket, but only minutes later it vibrated again, and he was too curious not to look. This time it was from Kouyou.

“You've gotta be fucking kidding me. You were the last fucking person I expected in the world to be a faggot, Aki. Please tell me they're just making stuff up.”

Another message rolled in, from Yuu again. “I know you saw that text, you've got your phone on vibration in your pants. Fucking text me back, dude! I can't believe you'd betray me like this!”

Somehow, anger boiled up in Akira's chest, and he shut his phone off completely, stomping up the stairs and into his bedroom. Betray him? Akira hadn't fucking betrayed anyone. He'd admit it, he wasn't all a-okay with gays either, but Yuu was an idiot if he thought he had the right to tell Akira who he could and couldn't kiss. It wasn't like it was Yuu's business anyway. So Akira had kissed a guy. A gay guy. The biggest loser in the entire school. That didn't mean Akira had betrayed anyone.

Plopping down on his bed, Akira decided he didn't have the energy to deal with this right now. He could sleep, and then maybe transfer to another school tomorrow. Yes, that sounded like a wonderful plan. Hopefully, a school where nobody had ever heard about him before and there was a female maths teacher he could fuck to pass. With that thought in mind, Akira fell into a deep sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

Akira was pulled from his sleep by an insistent knocking on his front door. Not really knocking. More like banging. He pulled himself up from the bed, stomping down the stairs to his front door, and the banging on his door continued while he walked. “I'm coming, I'M COMING!”

He pulled the door open only to be met with a smirking Takanori. “You're coming? So is it safe to assume you were masturbating and that's why your phone was off and you didn't answer the door?”

Akira groaned and rubbed a hand over his face. “I did answer the door, didn't I?” Then, as his brain started waking up properly he knitted his brows together in confusion. “How the hell do you know my number? Or my address, for that matter?”

“Oh please, Suzuki, there isn't a girl in school who doesn't have your number. I just found one of the most naïve bitches in class and explained to her that you had forgotten your homework and I wanted to give it back to you, and she gave me your cell phone number, your address, your parents' names and when they get home from work. It didn't occur to her to ask how the hell I would know about your homework.”

“Fine, forget I asked. What the fuck are you doing here, anyway?”

“I thought the whole point of this was for me to teach you maths, Suzuki. I'm not the type to take my end of a deal and just run away with it. You want to pass, I'll help you pass, but it's going to take some work on your part as well. You're going to actually have to study if you want to understand anything.”

Taken aback by how nice Takanori was being to him, Akira stared at him sceptically. “Why would you even bother? The whole school now thinks I'm gay, I'm officially your boyfriend whether I want it or not and I took your first kiss. You got your revenge, you got what you wanted. Why should you care whether or not I pass?”

“Because, Suzuki, believe it or not, I'm not a bad person. I promised to help you pass, and I'm going to help you pass. Besides, it's not like I have anything better to do with my free time than watch you struggle to comprehend even the most basic of equations.”

Akira wasn't sure if that last part was meant to be sarcastic or not, but he found himself stepping away from the door, allowing Takanori to come in. Kicking off his shoes, Takanori walked into the hallway and stared in awe at the furniture. “Big house, expensive shit, I'm starting to believe your father is a member of the Yakuza. Where's your room?”

Akira simply pointed up the stairs, and Takanori led the way, Akira following three steps behind with his hands in his pockets. Once they were inside his room, Akira closed and locked the door behind them, Takanori dumping his backpack on the floor and adjusting his glasses. “Well then, Suzuki, your books?” he said and gestured to Akira's bag, obviously knowing where they were but not willing to get them himself. Akira snorted and fished out his textbook, slamming it on his desk and sitting down, trying his best not to come with some sarcastic remark. Takanori was, after all, doing him a favour.

~

It was well past six o'clock when Akira's mum came home, calling out loudly that she needed help with her shopping bags. Takanori checked his watch and laughed.

“What's so funny?” Akira asked, his arms crossed defensively.

“That your mother is home at exactly the time my classmate told me she would be. Tell me, do you fuck a lot of girls after school? Right before your mum comes home and can catch you with your pants down?”

Akira snarled and left the room, deciding he might as well help his mother, if anything just to escape Takanori's sass.

When he reached the ground floor, Akira greeted his mum with a smile and a bow, picking up the bags and carrying them to the kitchen. He politely listened as his mother rambled on about her workday, not really paying attention to her gossip. When she was done, Akira excused himself and returned to his room, only to shriek in horror as he saw Takanori flipping through his porn mags.

“Is this what straight guys like, Suzuki?” Takanori asked, holding up an issue of playboy and tilting his head, looking up at Akira curiously.

“Of course it is!” Akira snapped and snatched the magazine from Takanori's hands. “It's only healthy to read porn. I'm sure you have lots of disgusting gay mags at home.”

“They're not disgusting. And I wasn't talking just about the porn. I was talking about the girls-in-miniskirts-so-short-you-can-see-her-panties pictures.” Takanori held up another magazine, pointing to a girl dressed in a traditional school uniform, and indeed you could see her panties under the hem of the skirt. “Maybe I should get one of these, Suzuki?”

Akira made a retching sound and stuffed the magazines back under his mattress where they belonged. “Absolutely not.”

“You are no fun, you know that?”

“If your idea of 'fun' is making me uncomfortable and risking my mum throwing me out of the house, then no, I'm no fun.”

Takanori just rolled his eyes and jumped up on the bed, making himself comfortable on the soft mattress. Akira eyed him suspiciously, sitting down on the end. After a long and awkward silence, during which Takanori didn't make a move to leave, Akira cleared his throat. “How long are you planning on staying here?”

“As long as I can.”

“You're not going to stay for dinner, are you?”

“Well, since you asked so nicely.”

Akira groaned and rubbed a hand over his face for the second time that day.

“If you keep doing that, you're going to lose braincells, you know. And with how few you have to begin with, the more you do that, the smaller your chance of passing maths is becoming,” Takanori pointed out, laying back and resting his hands behind his head.

“Then maybe you should stop irritating me so much.”

“Didn't anyone ever tell you that love was difficult?”

“They did. That's why I usually don't date.”

“And you're making an exception for me? Aww, how sweet of you.”

“Why do you insist on staying here so long? Don't you have lots of gay stuff to do at home?”

“Why are you still talking to me? Don't you have lots of straight stuff to do?” Takanori said through gritted teeth, his voice sounding so accusatory it made even Akira wince.

“Point taken.”

“The reason why I'm staying here is because for one, I wanted to see these parents who are willing to throw out their own son over something as stupid as bad grades. Second, if we really are going to be a couple you have to do couple-y things with me, Akira. Or no deal.”

Akira raised his hand and was about to shoot in some remark when Takanori interrupted him.

“Lastly, believe it or not, I came to see if you were okay.”

Akira just gaped and stared at him incredulously for a while, and Takanori seemed to be tracing a pattern in the roof with his eyes.

“You what?”

“People wouldn't shut up about it. All they were talking about was “Akira's gay”, “Akira kissed a guy”, “Akira turned”. You wouldn't believe how many stupid questions I got. Especially regarding our sex life.”

“My life is fucking ruined.” Akira groaned and buried his face in his hands.

“Oh shut up, you baby.”

“And what did you tell them?”

“I told them that yes, we're dating, yes, we kissed, and no, we haven't had sex.”

Grateful that Takanori at least hadn't lied about anything, Akira dared a look up at his supposed boyfriend. “And you're trying to tell me you came here to see if I was alright?”

“Mostly, I just wanted to see if your homophobic friends had beat the shit out of you yet, and if they had, laugh at you and tell you how much of a bitch Karma is.”

“And here I actually thought you were being nice to me.”

“After everything you've ever done for me?”

They were interrupted by Akira's mum calling out from below, informing them that dinner was ready. Akira stared wide-eyed in horror as Takanori propped himself up and licked his lips. “Great, I'm hungry.”

Just before Takanori had time to get up, Akira had shoved him down on the bed again and was staring at him from above. “If you tell my mum a fucking word, I'll kill you.”

Takanori simply pushed Akira off him and got up. “Calm down. I wouldn't do anything that could risk getting you thrown out. Then the whole point of everything would be gone, and I wouldn't be able to torture you any more. I'll just pretend I'm one of your normal, straight friends.”

Watching as Takanori opened the door and motioned for Akira to go first, Akira grunted and started walking down the stairs. Of course Takanori wouldn't do anything to jeopardize his plan now.

~

Takanori had been suspiciously polite and proper around Akira's parents, Akira realised as he was riding the bus to school. He didn't want to go, but his mum had picked up on that and lectured him for long enough that he knew he had to. Back to Takanori. For some reason, he hadn't said one crude word in the presence of Akira's family. It was suspicious. If anything, it was suspicious simply because it should be.

As Akira stepped onto the parking lot, he was greeted by an overly cheerful Takanori. “Sweetheart, my mother has insisted that you come visit us today.”

“What?” Akira tried not to sound incredulous, but he probably failed.

“I'd assume it's only natural for a mother to want to meet her son's boyfriend. Besides, she says she owes you a dinner.”

“You told your mother?!”

Takanori shrugged. “Quit shouting. Yes, I did. She wanted to know where I was yesterday, and I wasn't exactly going to lie to her.”

“And have you thought about what would happen if she calls my-”

“Calm the fuck down, Suzuki. As fucked up as it sounds, a lot of parents aren't thrilled about the idea that their sons are gay. I told her you were still in the closet and that your parents would disown you if they found out, and she promised not to tell anyone without your permission. She's thrilled, though. I haven't seen her this happy since our neighbour's dog died.”

Deciding not to ponder too long on what 'in the closet' meant, Akira turned Takanori around and shoved him in the direction of the school. “Right. Wonderful. Fucking perfect. And how do you expect me to convince your mother I'm gay? I'm straight, Takanori. I have no idea how to pretend I'm gay.”

Takanori turned around and glared angrily at Akira, who shrunk back. “How did you know I was gay, Suzuki?”

“You told me?”

“Would you have been able to guess, just by looking at me, that I like dicks?”

“Probably not?”

“What is the difference between homosexual guys and heterosexual guys?”

“One likes the same sex and the other likes the opposite?”

“Then what makes you think you have to act any different around my mother?”

Akira was silent for a long time.

“Listen up, Suzuki. The only way my mother will realise you're not gay is if you make stupid assumptions like that. Other than that, she'll assume that because we're dating, you're at least in some way attracted to guys.”

Akira just started walking towards the school, slouching over in shame. He really was being a presumptuous asshole, wasn't he? He had been brought up to believe that homosexuality was a disease, and the way his friends acted around any even remotely feminine guys definitely didn't help the matter.

Akira was surprised when Takanori didn't follow him. He had walked all the way to his classroom when he remembered that there were still fifteen minutes left 'till class and the door was still locked. Slumping down against the wall, Akira found the courage to turn his phone on for the first time since the previous day, and was surprised to find that other than Yuu and Kouyou, nobody had sent him any messages concerning 'the incident'.

He didn't even bother reading his friends' messages. He knew he would see them later any way, and if there was anything important they wanted to ask him, they could ask him in person. If he had read the texts he would most likely just have gotten mad any way.

Luckily for Akira, neither Yuu nor Kouyou were at school that day. They were at home, playing video games. Akira was very grateful for that. First period passed by quietly, and way too slowly for Akira's tastes. He wasn't surprised when class ended and Takanori was the first person to sneak in, greeting Akira with a cocky grin.

“I see Yuu and Kouyou aren't here today.”

“Were you looking for them?”

“No, but you don't have a black eye, so I'm just guessing.”

“They probably skipped.”

“No shit?” Takanori chuckled. “I'm glad to see that my darling is such an avid learner.”

“Shut up. I'm only here because my mum threatened to ground me unless I went.”

“Aww, and here I thought you just really loved spending time with me. Speaking of which, it's Friday. There's a weekend coming up. Do you know what normal couples do in the weekends?”

“Hang out, I guess?” Akira answered, before he realized what Takanori was onto and his eyes widened. “No, wait, you don't-”

“I won't force you to sleep over,” Takanori cut him off quickly, “since I know how gay that would seem to you and your parents would probably think it suspicious, but I will ask you to spend some time with me.”

“Don't you have any friends to hang out with or something?”

Takanori's eyes narrowed into slits and he grabbed the collar of Akira's shirt, pulling his face close and practically snarling at him. “Guess what, I fucking don't. I have one friend, Suzuki, one friend in the whole world and he doesn't even go to this school. So no, I don't have any friends to hang out with or something.”

Akira blinked and tried to push Takanori away. “Well excuse me for asking, then.”

“Go ahead.” Takanori didn't let go of Akira's shirt, and Akira was starting to worry it would get crumpled. “Make fun of me. Tease me. Takanori doesn't have any friends. Takanori isn't cool enough. Takanori's too much of a loser fag.”

“Dude, I didn't say anything, did I? Now let go of me.” Takanori just stared at Akira for a couple more seconds before he let his hands drop to his sides, his gaze shifting towards the ground. “All right, fine, I agreed to this deal and I'm desperate to pass, so we'll spend the weekend together. I'll bring my textbook to your place and you can help me study, okay?” Akira didn't bother telling Takanori that he didn't really have anything better to do since he wasn't on speaking terms with Yuu and Kouyou. It didn't matter.

“Fine,” Takanori grumbled and continued staring at the floor. The air was tense, and Akira felt extremely awkward, but he didn't want to say anything. Luckily, Takanori broke the silence before Akira had the chance to embarrass himself by saying something stupid just to say something. “See you at lunch.”

Akira watched Takanori's back as he left, leaving Akira all alone in the empty classroom and with ten minutes left until next period. Oh great, he had maths. Akira fished out his books and decided he might as well make an effort to pay attention. After all, these grades decided whether or not he had a bed to come home to.

~

Akira was surprised at how quickly Takanori's mood changed. He was certain Takanori would be pissed at him for the rest of the day, but he had showed up at the end of second period, grinning cheerfully and dragging Akira off to the cafeteria. Akira was hardly there, considering he spent most of his recesses following Yuu and Kouyou as they beat up juniors and ate behind the school. The first thing that hit him was the noise. Everyone was talking and laughing, and as Akira looked around, he saw a lot of people smiling. As sad as it may sound, he didn't usually see a lot of smiles.

“Well then, Suzuki, pick a table,” Takanori said and gestured to the whole room. Akira quickly scanned the tables for the one with the least people, and he pointed to one close to the wall. He knew a few of the people sitting there, and he knew they respected him too much to tease him about the fact that he had a boyfriend.

Takanori yanked on Akira's arm, pulling him to the table and finding an empty spot, pushing Akira down first and sitting next to him, much too close for comfort. Akira would have whined if he wasn't too cool for that.

“Hey, Akira-senpai,” one of the boys said and smiled, and all the guys at the table nodded their heads in greeting, before turning their gazes to Takanori, who held his head high despite the scrutinizing looks he received. Akira realised he should probably introduce him, so he swallowed a lump in his throat and draped his arm around Takanori's shoulders, hugging him close.

“This is Takanori, my boyfriend,” he said, and was shocked at himself for how easily he was able to admit that. He had thought he would deny it, but it was actually pretty simple to pretend, and he didn't even flinch when Takanori leaned his head on Akira's shoulder, grinning.

“Pleased to meet you all.”

Akira wasn't quite sure what he had expected. Teasing, mockery, sarcastic comments, maybe, but nobody said anything. They smiled politely, although Akira could see that some of them faked it. It was still a better reaction than he had imagined, and he was grateful when nobody let the awkward silence settle, starting up random conversations and finishing their food.

It was the first lunch break in ages that Akira hadn't seen someone cry, but in stead listened as the people around him laughed and chatted away happily. Takanori even joined in a couple of times, discussing different topics and looking like he was actually enjoying himself. And as Akira listened to him talk, he realised just how smart Takanori actually was. He knew something about everything, it seemed, and he was especially enthusiastic when it came to certain topics like science and literature.

For once, Akira actually felt like the recess passed too fast, and he caught himself smiling as he and Takanori walked back to his classroom. He quickly pursed his lips and furrowed his brows, and Takanori giggled next to him.

“I know you won't admit it, but I think you actually enjoyed yourself.”

“Good food,” Akira lied, despite knowing that Takanori could see straight through it.

“Yep,” Takanori chuckled and shook his head.

“You did, too,” Akira pointed out, and he was shocked when he saw Takanori tensing up, biting his lip. He shook it off quickly, though, ignoring whatever had annoyed him in favour of teasing Akira.

“I'll bet you miss your friends. Wouldn't it be wonderful to have them here right now?”

Akira grunted and furrowed his brows. “Yeah, if anything just so they could beat you senseless.”

“They can't beat the gay out of me, Suzuki. A lot of people have tried, but I'm still a cock-sucking faggot.”

“That was not a mental image I needed.”

“You're welcome.”

“You're disgusting.”

“Cock tastes good, though. You should try it some time.”

Akira made a demonstrative retching sound. “I'd bite it off.”

“Remind me to never let you blow me.”

“Deal.”

When they reached the classroom, Akira turned around to face Takanori, a puzzled look on his face. “Why hasn't anyone punched me yet?”

Takanori shrugged. “You're a popular guy, Suzuki. You're cool and everyone likes you. Besides, your friends are strong. I guess people are just scared that if they as much as laid a hand on you, either their friends would stop talking to them or they'd get beat to a pulp by Yuu or Kouyou.”

“I guess it would be too much to hope that they just don't have any problem with two guys dating?”

Takanori turned and walked off quickly, and Akira stared after him, puzzled. Takanori was really confusing sometimes. He was more complicated than Akira ever would have guessed if he hadn't gotten this close to him, yet he knew that there were probably many things he was still hiding from Akira. Like the reason why he suddenly strode off without as much as a goodbye.

That was when Akira remembered that he had a 'date' tonight, and he groaned loudly and pulled his phone out of his pocket. He texted his mum to tell her that she didn't have to make dinner for him because he was going to a friend's place after school. He didn't even bother asking for permission. He knew his mother was more than happy to just get him out of the house, and most days he didn't even tell her that he had plans. He knew his parents didn't miss him, or care about him at all. And as much as he told himself that it was fine that way, that it meant he could do whatever he wanted and be out for as long as he wished, a tiny tear rolled down his cheek when he got the reply from his mother.

_Wonderful. In fact, your dad and I could use some space so don't even bother coming back afterwards. You can stop by the conbini and buy a toothbrush with your school money or something, just sleep somewhere else tonight._


	3. Chapter 3

Akira was walking towards the school exit, scratching the back of his head forlornly. How was he supposed to explain to Takanori that he had to sleep over? Moreover, how was he going to do that without getting teased about it afterwards? He groaned in frustration, only to flinch as he felt a hand grasping his, fingers entwining, and he wasn't the least surprised when he looked to his side to find Takanori smiling up at him.

“Hello, sweetheart,” he said, and Akira noted the cheerful tone in his voice. He was starting to wonder if Takanori was bipolar or something.

“Hey, listen, I have a problem.”

“What is it now, Suzuki? More math stuff?”

Shooting him an annoyed look, Akira pulled Takanori with him, rounding a corner and dragging him into the restroom, pushing him into one of the toilet stalls and getting in himself, locking the door.

“Well gee, Suzuki, if you're that eager then fine but at least wait until we get home. We can't fuck in the school you know.” Takanori smirked and pressed himself against Akira's chest, only to frown as he was pushed down to sit on the lid of the toilet.

“My mother is having some guests over, so I can't go home tonight,” Akira lied, hoping Takanori would believe him. “I'll have to stay the night with you, but I swear to god if you try anything I will cut your balls off.”

“Don't worry about that, if my mum agrees she'll be up all night with her ear pressed against the wall, ready to blast the door down and ramble about safe sex and condoms if she hears so much as a moan,” Takanori giggled. “Also, I'm having a friend over tomorrow, hope you don't mind the company.”

“Not unless you decide to have sex, because then I'll run out screaming before I go blind.”

“Gay sex has never made a man blind. Except on the rare occasion that someone gets a penis in their eye but that's just unfortunate. And don't worry, I have excellent control of my dick.”

“You mean it's too small to actually damage anything other than your pride.”

Takanori pouted at that, crossing his arms over his chest. “My dick is perfectly big enough, thank you.”

“Okay, so who is this friend of yours?”

“He's my only friend, Suzuki.”

“Yes I got that, but what's he like?”

“He's gay so you can make up your own stereotypical opinion of what he's like.”

A loud thud resonated in the otherwise silent room as Akira's fist connected with the wall, and he growled at a startled Takanori. “Will you stop it? As much as you'd like to believe it, I don't hate gays, Takanori. Contrary to a lot of people, I know that it's not a deadly disease. I may not know shit about maths, but I'm smart enough to understand that not all gays are particularly feminine, interested in fashion or any of that bullshit.”

Takanori blinked, staring wide-eyed at Akira who took a few deep breaths to calm himself. When he thought it safe, he spoke up. “His name is Yutaka, he lives only a couple hundred metres away from me but he had to change schools to another district because of too much bullying. We came out of the closet at around the same time, so we started hanging out and became friends after that. He's naïvely nice sometimes, but he's shy and will definitely get scared if you go around punching walls like that.”

Akira muttered an apology and unlocked the door, getting out of the stall and leaving the school building again. Takanori hurried after him, his brows furrowing. He could tell that Akira was lying about his mother having friends over, but he didn't ask. For some reason, he didn't have a house to come home to that night and Takanori wasn't going to risk asking him about it. If Akira didn't want to talk about it, it was probably best not to pry. Luckily, Takanori's mother would only be thrilled that he had someone to spend time with, so she most likely wouldn't refuse to let Akira stay.

The bus ride to Takanori's place was awkward, to say the least. Akira was staring out of the window intently, Takanori fidgeting with the hem of his t-shirt. They were both silent, and when Takanori got up from his seat and announced that this was their stop, Akira was only grateful that the ride was finally over. Takanori motioned for Akira to follow him, leading the way to his house. The first thing Akira noticed was that it was small, with only one floor, and as Takanori fished out his keys, Akira wondered how little space there actually was in there.

“Your house is really small.” Akira hadn't meant to sound rude, but Takanori frowned at him nonetheless.

“Not everyone has parents who works for the Yakuza. Besides, there's not a lot of space needed for just two people.”

“Your father doesn't live here?”

Takanori visibly stiffened, his hands curling into fists as he glared at the door. “None of your fucking business, Suzuki.”

Rolling his eyes with an exasperated sigh, Akira grabbed Takanori's shoulders and turned him around to face him. “I'm your boyfriend, I do believe it's my business.”

Takanori swatted Akira's hands away, staring at the ground. “Why do you act like you care? There's no-one around, Suzuki, you don't have to pretend anymore.”

Akira almost wanted to punch Takanori right then and there, but he crossed his arms over his chest, his voice increasing in volume as he felt anger rise in him. “Why do you fight me so much? I know you don't like me, and I don't exactly blame you, but stop giving me such a hard time just because I'm concerned about you. It's obvious that this is a painful subject to you, since you tense up and get all defensive, but would you at least let me try to help?”

When Takanori lifted his gaze only to stare at him with utter loathing, Akira almost flinched back. “There's not a fucking thing you can do to 'help'. Daddy's out of the picture, he's not coming back and I don't miss the fucking piece of shit. Now shut the fuck up and stop touching me so much.”

When Takanori turned around again to unlock the door and walk in, taking off his shoes and heading for the kitchen, Akira sighed and rolled his eyes. “I like you better when you're clingy and teasing, you know.”

Once again Akira was baffled by the change in Takanori's mood as he made himself a cup of tea and turned around to grin at him. “Oh, so now you admit you like me? We're making progress, Suzuki.”

“Sometimes I wonder if you're bipolar.”

“Well, they say people act weird around their lovers, so I blame you.”

“We're not lovers.” Akira followed Takanori to the living room, laying his books on the table and flipping to the page they were on.

“Of course not, Mr. Straight. Now shut up and let's continue with the algebra.”

~

When you're used to living in a certain way, anything that's different will seem abnormal. If you've lived all your life in a green house, changing to a red one will seem silly, and you'll wonder how anyone can live like that.

Akira had spent all the nights of his life either at his own place, or at Yuu's or Kouyou's. His family didn't like him, he knew that much. He had also picked up on the dislike Yuu and Kouyou's families had for them. He was used to being around families that saw him and their own sons as a nuisance, and the feelings were mutual. When his parents came home from work, there was hardly any dialogue, and what little there was was strained and awkward. It was the way Akira was used to living.

Thus, Akira's eyes almost popped out of their sockets when Takanori's mother came home and was greeted with a hug by her son.

“How was your day?” Her tone of voice was soft and laced with love, and Akira was staring dumbfounded.

Takanori rolled his eyes, but he was smiling widely. “Same old things, boring teachers, boring students, boring homework. Oh yeah, and my not-so-boring boyfriend is here.”

Two pairs of eyes turned towards Akira, whose jaw now looked like it was about to fall off its hinges. He was envious, to say the least. A mother-son relationship that didn't involve spiteful comments, sarcasm, and loathing glares. It was as new to him as the rainforest is to a penguin.

“Oh, you must be Akira!” Takanori's mother smiled, and Akira was lucky to remember his manners and bow or Takanori would have had his head.

“Nice to meet you, Matsumoto-san.”

“I'm helping him with his homework, my poor darling has a problem with maths. It's like numbers hate him,” Takanori said, not missing the glare he got from Akira in return.

“Of course, just continue, I'll call for you when dinner is ready.”

“Oh, and could Akira stay the night?” Takanori sported a pair of puppy eyes that almost frightened Akira. It was weird to see the otherwise snide Takanori act in such a way. He almost seemed... cute.

“Sure,” his mother said and ruffled his hair. “But if I catch you two lovebirds doing anything pornographic then one of you will have to sleep on the couch.”

Takanori grinned and winked at her before dragging Akira back to his room. He stretched out on the futon in the middle and laid his hands behind his head. “You heard her, Suzuki, no jerking off tonight. The couch isn't very comfortable.”

“If I'm supposed to share that thing with you, I prefer the couch,” Akira said and frowned at the futon. It wasn't that small, but it wasn't very big either.

“Relax, I sleep fully clothed and I won't touch you inappropriately unless you want me to,” Takanori said and licked his lips.

“So you will touch me appropriately, then?”

“I'm a baby when I sleep. I'll most likely spoon you and snore in your ear.”

“Do I look like a teddy to you?”

“Do I look like a homo?”

Akira groaned and rubbed a hand over his face. “Now you're taking advantage of your sexuality.”

“Why, you won't bully girls?”

“When did homosexual equal girl?”

“When your friends started calling me a sissy.”

Takanori's voice was quiet, and Akira took it as a warning not to press the subject. He had no idea how to handle a crying Takanori. Hell, he had no idea how to handle a breathing Takanori, but that was another matter. Takanori seemed extremely sensitive about anything that had to do with Yuu and Kouyou, so Akira thought it best to shut up.

“I don't suppose you'll kiss me again?” When Akira's head snapped up to glare at him, Takanori snickered. “I guess not.”

“Why on earth would I?”

“To convince my mother?”

“She warned us not to have sex. I must really look gay.”

“You do.”

“Any other reason you just asked me that?”

Takanori grinned. “I told you, you're not half bad.”

“You are.”

“I haven't had a lot of practice. I don't know if you've noticed, but there aren't exactly a lot of faggots around.”

“I'm not your lab rat.”

“Shame.”

“How about that friend of yours?”

Shrugging, Takanori got up from the futon to get a book. “I'm not attracted to him.”

“But you are to me?”

“Don't flatter yourself.”

“You're the one who wants to kiss me.”

“So maybe I do,” Takanori said and sat down on the futon. “What's it to you?”

Akira looked baffled for a second, before he burst out laughing. “You're asking me what it matters to me that you want to kiss my lips?”

“Forget it, Suzuki,” Takanori said and opened his book, his eyes scanning over the page to find out where he left off.

Shaking his head, Akira laid down on the futon, both mentally and physically exhausted. If he were any less tired, he would have thought about families and relationships. As it were, Akira fell asleep within seconds, curling up on the mattress.

~

“Hey, sleeping beauty, dinner's ready.” Akira groaned as he sat up on the futon, blinking repeatedly. He heard Takanori's deep chuckle above him, and he had half a mind to punch him.

“What are we having?”

“Miso soup."

Akira groaned even louder and stood up, following Takanori as he led the way to the kitchen, giggling. “What, you got a problem with miso soup?”

“And if I do?”

“Well I'm sorry that not everyone is rich enough to afford beef everyday, but you take what you get and don't insult my mum or I'll chop your fucking dick off.” Takanori hummed, and Akira was almost scared at how calm he sounded when he said that.

“You're not getting anywhere near my dick, ever.”

“Dream on, baby,” Takanori laughed, kneeling in front of the low table and motioning for Akira to sit next to him. When he scrambled down and sat awkwardly with his hands in his lap, Takanori giggled and leaned over to whisper in his ear “You look uncomfortable.”

“I'm not used to sitting on the floor and eating, okay?” he whispered back. “At home we have a real table.”

“Well you're not at home, so live with it.” Akira groaned, but Takanori jabbed him in the side with his elbow and Akira shut up as Takanori's mother sat down, smiling at them with a cheerful 'itadakimasu!'

“Itadakimasu!” Akira and Takanori replied, picking up their bowls and drinking the soup as Takanori's mother watched them with a curious smile.

“So, Akira, how did you get to know Takanori? My son never talked about you before yesterday, and then all he told me was that you two were boyfriends.”

Akira almost choked on his soup, but he stopped himself in time and set the bowl down, chewing his lip as he tried to think of an answer, but Takanori beat him to it. “I wanted to try and learn to play the guitar, so my music teacher introduced me to Akira, and he helped me.” Akira didn't know what surprised him the most, the fact that Takanori called him Akira for the first time, or that he could lie so well right to his mum's face.

“I see. And you fell in love with him, how cute.”

“Oh come on mum, look at him, he's gorgeous,” Takanori replied calmly, adjusting his glasses and finishing his soup.

“Indeed, he doesn't look like he'd be batting for the other team,” Takanori's mum said, and Akira immediately tensed up. “Tell me, dear, don't your parents support you?”

Akira's mouth was flapping like a fish on land, and once again he was saved by Takanori. “Mum, please don't ask about that, he's not out yet and it's a touchy subject for him.” Out? What the hell did that mean?

“Of course, I apologize for my intrusion. Well, if your parents love you, I'm sure it won't matter to them. And if it does, then you need new parents.”

Takanori's shoulders rose up to his ears and he stiffened, staring at his bowl like it had just offended him, and Akira didn't fail to notice the tension that filled the air as Takanori's mother frowned.

“Gochisosama,” Takanori muttered and got up from the table, striding off to his room, and Akira stared at Takanori's mum in confusion. She gave him a pitiful smile, shaking her head lightly.

“When Takanori realized he liked men, his father said that he would never live with the shame of having a gay son. We divorced, and he left the house never to come back. I guess Taka is still bitter about it.”

“I'm sorry.”

“Don't be. I don't want a husband who refuses to recognize his own son over something as stupid as his sexuality. Now finish your soup and please go comfort Takanori, he needs love and care right now, even if he won't admit it.”

Akira nodded and emptied his bowl, getting up and turning towards the sink, but Takanori's mother took the bowl out of his hands and smiled at him. “I'll get it, don't worry.”

“Gochisosama,” Akira said and bowed, hurrying back to Takanori's room.


	4. Chapter 4

Akira slammed the door behind him, crossing his arms over his chest and scowling at the heap of limbs that was Takanori curled up on his futon, facing away from the door. “You didn't tell me your father was a homophobe.”

“I don't have a father.”

“Is that what he said, too?”

“Go away.”

Sighing, Akira sat down on the futon and stared at the ground. “I know what it's like to have parents who don't want to acknowledge your existence.” He did. And he was starting to have sympathy for Takanori. He was being bullied, cast out and even disowned by his own father for his sexuality. It made Akira's gut churn.

“At least in my case, it's not my fault. I can't change who I'm attracted to. You can stop being stupid.”

“That was uncalled for.”

A sigh came from Takanori, and the room was silent for a couple of minutes before he spoke up again. “If you came here to laugh at me and tell me how pathetic I am, just get it over with already.”

“Maybe I just came here because I am concerned about you.”

“Don't make yourself sound like the good guy, Suzuki.”

“I'm not as bad as you'd like to think.”

After another long silence, Takanori rolled over and stared up at him. Akira turned to look at him, raising an eyebrow as Takanori seemed to be having an inner debate on something.

“If you really came in here because you were concerned about me, will you kiss me again?”

Akira couldn't help but laugh. “You definitely won't give up, will you?”

“It would make me in a much better mood.”

“Fine,” Akira said, and laughed again as Takanori's mouth fell open and he stared at him in shock. “What?”

“Did the hetero just agree to kiss a man?”

“I told you, I'm not a bad guy.”

“Did Akira fucking Suzuki, mr. I-get-all-the-girls-I-want-any-time-I-want, the straightest man on earth, just agree to kiss me?”

“Don't push it.”

Takanori immediately sat up, closing his eyes. “Go ahead.”

Akira rolled his eyes, thinking that Takanori looked immensely cute like that. And he almost slapped himself just for thinking it.

“I'm waiting.”

Akira touched his lips gently to Takanori's, not pressing hard, but not pulling back either. After a couple of seconds, Takanori dared make a move, and he rubbed his lips softly against Akira's, feeling Akira respond by nipping at his lower lip. The kiss was awkward, and when they pulled apart, Akira blushed and looked another way, licking his lips and tasting Takanori on them.

“Fuck.” Takanori said, folding his hands in his lap and staring at them.

“Better now?”

“Thank you,” Takanori whispered, smiling gently and almost melting Akira's heart.

“Now I never want to hear you calling me 'mr. straight' again. Clear?”

“Hmmm, just to be sure, you can bribe me with another one?” Takanori licked his lips, grinning cheekily.

“Fuck no.”

“You're so mean,” Takanori giggled, swatting Akira's shoulder, and Akira grinned at him.

“Says the guy trying to blackmail me and then hitting my shoulder.”

“Oh, boohoo, did the faggot hit you? It wasn't that hard, take it like a proper man.”

“It's not about how hard you hit. It's the fact that you would hit your poor, innocent, sensitive boyfriend that baffles me.”

Takanori burst out laughing, falling down on the futon and staring up at the ceiling. “I'm just evil like that.”

They sat in silence for a long while, before Akira turned to Takanori with a curious glance. “What was that thing you told your mother, though? About me teaching you how to play guitar?”

“I needed to come up with something,” Takanori shrugged. “I've seen the guitars hanging on your wall. You obviously play.”

“I do. But what if your mother expects you to show her? I mean, play her a song or something?”

“I don't own a guitar. It would be difficult.”

“Oh.”

After a while, Takanori grinned and looked at Akira. “You know, it's really sexy when men can play instruments.”

Akira laughed and swatted Takanori's thigh. “You don't need to flirt with me, we're already a couple.”

“The cutest one at school,” Takanori hummed. “But I need to keep the love alive, you know? It wouldn't do any good to become a dull old couple who never whisper sweet things to each other, never hold hands, never have romantic walks in the moonlight...”

“I never did that with any girls.”

“Because you fucked them, but you didn't love them.”

Akira nodded and contemplated that sentence for a while. No, he couldn't say he had ever really loved anyone. All those girls he dated, it was mostly for the sex, and partly to uphold his status. There had never been any serious feelings involved, at least not from his side.

“I can hear the gears in your head turning.”

“Is it illegal to think?”

“I think you're thinking too hard about something that doesn't need to be thought about all that much. Just accept the fact that you've never loved anyone before and move on. It's not the end of the world. You'll find someone.”

“What do you care? You just want to fool around with me and play your sadistic little game, then once I graduate you're gonna go look for a delightfully fabulous homo and you'll marry him and live happily ever after.”

When Takanori didn't say anything, Akira was about to open his mouth when he noticed how rigid Takanori looked. It was like he was really mad about something, but he was trying not to show it.

“Dude, you oka-”

“Shut up.” And Akira did, if only because he feared what Takanori would do to his balls if he didn't.

“Is that really all it is to you?”

“What?”

“Nevermind,” Takanori said and got up from the bed, starting to undress.

“What are you doing?”

“I'm not going to touch you or anything, Suzuki, so calm the fuck down. I'm tired and I'm going to bed. You should do the same.”

Akira bit his lip, taking off his shirt and trousers and sitting awkwardly in nothing but his boxers while Takanori put on an oversized T-shirt to sleep in and threw another one at Akira's face. “Put this on. I can't promise I won't molest you if you walk around with your abs showing like that.”

“Thanks for the warning,” Akira said and pulled the tee over his head.

Takanori slipped out of the room and into the bathroom on the opposite side of the hall, and Akira listened to the sound of the water running. When Takanori came back, sleepy and with his breath smelling of menthol, Akira awkwardly scratched the back of his head.

“I forgot to buy a toothbrush.”

“I think we have some unused ones in the cupboard next to the mirror.”

“Thanks,” Akira nodded and got up, finding the bathroom and emptying his bladder before looking for a toothbrush. He assumed it was okay to borrow Takanori's toothpaste as well.

When he returned to Takanori's room, the lights were off and Takanori was lying under the covers, and Akira noticed to his horror that there was only one duvet. He crawled onto the futon, which was ridiculously small for two people, and tried lying as far away from Takanori as possible, but after a while it got really cold without a blanket, and he slowly inched closer to Takanori, pulling the duvet over him.

“You're so fucking awkward, you know,” Takanori mumbled, rolling over so he was facing Akira and wrapping the blanket over them both, snuggling his head into the pillow and closing his eyes. How Takanori could be so comfortable when their bodies were almost pressed up against each other, Akira had no idea. He could feel Takanori's body against his side, his breath on Akira's shoulder.

Surprisingly, it didn't take all that long before Akira fell asleep to the monotone sound of Takanori's snoring.

~

The first thing Takanori noticed when he woke up was that he could barely move his arm. When he looked down, he was shocked to discover that Akira was clinging to it, cutting off the bloodflow as he hugged the limb tightly, sleeping with his mouth open and tickling Takanori with his breath.

Takanori snuck out of bed, careful not to wake Akira as he went to eat breakfast, then brush his teeth and get dressed. When he came back to his room, Akira was still sound asleep, and Takanori watched him for a minute or two with a smile on his face. Then he left the room again, taking a book with him and sitting down in the living room to read.

He had read at least fifty pages when the doorbell rang, and he shot up from the couch, running to the door. Pulling it open, he grinned widely when he saw who it was. “Yutaka!”

Yutaka smiled and handed his bag to Takanori, who carried it into the living room and set it down next to the couch. “Wow, Yutaka, this thing is heavy! Did you pack for a month, or?”

“I needed to bring a toothbrush, hairbrush, extra clothes, extra extra clothes in case I get dirty or something...” When Takanori grinned and wiggled his eyebrows at him, Yutaka blushed furiously. “Not like that! Anyway, how was your week?”

“School's boring without you.”

Yutaka sighed, an apologetic smile creeping up his face. “Taka you know I can't-”

“I know.” Takanori sighed and scratched the back of his head. “Sorry I mentioned it. Well, whatever, at least I have someone to talk to at school now.”

Yutaka's face lit up and he smiled from ear to ear. “Really? That's great, Taka, I'm so happy for you! Who is it?”

“My new boyfriend, Akira,” Takanori answered and grinned widely.

“Woah, hold up a sec there. Akira?”

“Yep.”

“Akira Suzuki?”

“Yes.”

“The Akira Suzuki?”

“Blonde, tall, handsome oaf.”

"Isn't he straight as a log, though?”

“He is.”

Yutaka cocked his head to one side and looked like he had just seen a giraffe on a one-wheel bike juggling armadillos. “You're confusing me.”

“He came up to me the other day and said that he needed help studying and was willing to do anything to pass maths this year.”

“No way.”

“Yes way. Apparently, if he can't get a decent grade, his parents will throw him out.”

“You know it's mean taking advantage of that, right?”

“Let me remind you that his best friends are the main reason you had to change schools.”

Yutaka sighed and sat down on the couch, slapping his thighs absently. “So you told him that you'd help him study if he would pretend to be your boyfriend.”

“Not just pretend. I mean do actual boyfriend-y shit with me.”

“And you got him to agree to that?”

“He kissed me. Twice.”

Yutaka let out a gasp. “You're kidding!”

“He's currently sleeping on my bed, you can go ask him yourself.”

“Don't tell me you two... you know.”

Takanori burst out laughing. “No. He's still straight, you know.”

“But he kissed you.”

“If your home depended on it, wouldn't you kiss a girl?”

Yutaka made a disgusted face and stuck his tongue out. “Yuck. But yeah, I guess.”

“Surprisingly, kissing a guy is not all that different from kissing a girl.” Yutaka looked up to see Akira walking into the living room, yawning and scratching the back of his head. “Do you have any coffee here?”

“So you admit that kissing me wasn't half bad?” Takanori said smugly, crossing his arms over his chest.

“It was. You're a horrible kisser. I'm just saying that your lips are hardly any different from a girl's lips. You just have no idea what to do with them and end up awkwardly moving them around.”

“You should teach me then, since you're such an expert.”

“Do you or do you not have coffee?” Apparently unaffected by Akira's change of topic, Takanori went to the kitchen, leaving a dumbstruck Yutaka with his mouth wide open on the couch, staring at Akira who raised an eyebrow at him. “You must be Takanori's friend.”

“Yutaka,” Yutaka answered and bowed his head.

“No need for the formality, I'm still in my PJs.”

“And you look stunningly hot in them,” Takanori shouted from the kitchen, to which Akira rolled his eyes.

“Is he always like that? Overly flirtatious yet still a sarcastic ass?”

“Mostly.”

“Good to know it's not just me. So, Yutaka, Takanori hasn't told me anything about you. Do you live with your parents?” Akira sat down on the couch next to Yutaka, who gave a small nod. “And how do they feel about you being gay?”

“They refuse to acknowledge it. They're still convinced that I like girls.” Yutaka hung his head, and Akira patted his back.

“Get a boyfriend, that should show them.”

“You don't have a problem with it?”

Akira threw his arms up in the air. “Why does everyone just assume that I'm a homophobe? Do I look like a prejudiced asshole?”

“You do,” Takanori said and set a cup of coffee down in front of him, plopping down in his lap.

“Well thanks, that helps a lot.” Yutaka watched in awe as Akira picked up his cup with one hand, slinging the other around Takanori's waist and rubbing circles on his hip as he drank. “Much better.”

“I'm sorry, it's just, most straight people don't like two guys being together.”

“Well that's just stupid," Akira said, setting down his cup. "I mean yeah, I would never have sex with a guy, and just being in a relationship with Takanori makes it feel like I'm betraying my own sexuality, but there's nothing wrong with two guys loving each other.”

Takanori rolled his eyes. “You should have heard him squeal when I asked him to be my boyfriend. He's a total homophobe, don't let him deceive you.”

“Am not,” Akira said, taking another sip from his cup and frowning at Takanori.

“Are too.” Takanori answered, smiling smugly at him.

“Okay, I'll admit, I wasn't crazy about the idea to begin with. I grew up in a heterosexual environment where gays were believed to be an abomination that should be wiped from the face of earth,” and Akira stopped right there when he noticed that Takanori was clenching his fists. “But you don't fit the gay stereotype, and neither does Yutaka, so that forces me to believe that maybe you aren't the unnatural fairies my parents raised me to think you are.”

“Well damn, Suzuki, you almost convinced me there,” Takanori said and grinned. “Maybe if you fucked me, I'd believe you.”

“The point wasn't to convince you, it was to convince Yutaka. Please believe me when I tell you I have no problems with homosexuals any more.”

“If you say so.” Yutaka said and giggled. “You two are so cute together, arguing like that.”

“Most adorable couple on earth,” Takanori grinned and snatched Akira's cup, tasting the coffee. “Ugh, this is disgusting, how can you drink this shit?”

“I'll say the same to you about cum.”

“I've never had the opportunity to taste any, so how would I know?”

“You're a failed homosexual.”

“Not my fault there aren't any faggots living around.”

“There's Yutaka.”

“I'd never fuck him.”

Yutaka whined and slapped Takanori's thigh. “Thanks a lot.”

“You love me.”

“I don't.”

“Sure you don't. You visit me every weekend because you hate me.”

“I hate that you're so smug all the time.”

“Aww, I love you too darling,” Takanori said in the most gooey voice he could muster, battering his eyelashes at Yutaka who stuck his tongue out at him. “Well, it's a long day and it only just started, what do you guys want to do?”

“Oh, can we go to the pond and feed the ducks like we always do?” Yutaka asked, smiling widely.

“Sure. You okay with that, Suzuki?”

Akira stared blankly as Yutaka pouted at him and made his best attempt at puppy eyes. It was a scary sight, at the same as it was adorable, if only because Yutaka really did look like a puppy. “Do I even have a choice?”

“Yay! Thank you soooo much, Akira,” Yutaka said and smiled giddily, getting up and pulling on Takanori's arm. “Come on, let's go let's go let's go!”

Takanori laughed, a rare sound to Akira's ears. “Relax, we still need to get dressed. Do you have money for bread?”

“Enough,” Yutaka practically sang, shoving Takanori into his room. “Just hurry up and change!”

Akira felt his lips pulling up at the sight. Takanori seemed comfortable around this guy, and it was enough to relax Akira as well. For some reason, the sight of a smiling, giggling Takanori made him feel happy himself. Takanori was right, today would be a long day, and Akira was certainly looking forward to it.


	5. Chapter 5

Akira was honestly in awe. How one person managed to smile so much during one day, he had no idea. Yukata seemed like he was having the day of his life, and when Akira had asked Takanori if he was, Takanori's response had been to laugh and shrug his shoulders.

“Yutaka is always like this.”

Akira was currently sitting on a bench in a park, watching Takanori feed the ducks. There was a flock of hungry birds in the pond in front of him, and at the edge sat Yutaka, crouched over with a loaf of bread in his hand, breaking off bits of it and throwing them into the water.

When about half the bread was left, Takanori announced that he wanted to rest his legs, ruffling Yutaka's hair and ignoring his whine as he sat down next to Akira, smiling. Smiling.

“You're in a good mood,” Akira stated, to which Takanori shrugged his shoulders.

“Yutaka is contagious.”

“I guess he is.” They sat for a while and just watched while Yutaka laughed and continued throwing bread into the pond. Occasionally, he would talk to the birds, an endearing sight to say the least. It was almost hard to believe this guy was as old as Takanori, when he had such a childlike aura about him. Childlike in a good way, because it made Akira feel less stressed, being around someone who got enjoyment out of basically anything. Akira was sure he could shove this guy into the water, and he'd start laughing and swimming with the ducks.

“Aren't we a happy family,” Takanori suddenly said with the best goo-goo voice he could muster.

“Did you just call your best friend a child?”

“Look at him,” Takanori said, gesturing to Yutaka as he fell into the pond, shook the wet hair out of his eyes, laughed, and continued feeding the ducks. Akira was only slightly surprised that he'd been right.

“Well congratulations, you make a wonderful mother,” Akira joked, watching Yutaka intently while he continued breaking the bread into little pieces.

“And you'll be the strict father who comes home, yells at the dog for pooping on the floor, sweeps me off my feet and carries me to my bedroom where we make sweet love all night long.”

“You've watched too many films.”

“Maybe I have, but you can't deny that it would be terribly romantic.”

“Terribly is the right word.” After a couple of seconds, he added “Why the dog though?”

Takanori faked a gasp and stared at Akira. “Are you meaning to say you don't plan on having a dog?”

“I just don't see the point, it seems like a lot of work.”

“So are kids.”

“I never planned on having any.”

“Too bad. You're stuck with him now.”

Akira raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

“He seems to like you, Suzuki. I told you he's a naïve little shit, and his judgement of character is horrible, but it appears to me that he really likes you.”

“What do you mean 'his judge of character is horrible'?!”

“Oh come on. Be completely honest with yourself and tell me; do you really think you would make a wonderful, kind, caring friend for someone like him?”

“As a matter of fact, I do.” Akira hadn't meant to sound defensive, but he did, and Takanori laughed at him.

“Sure thing. And then Yuu or Kouyou stops by to say hello and he falls to the ground crying.”

Akira snapped his head to the side and stared at Takanori, who was watching Yutaka again. What did he just say?

“Oh my god, you really are an idiot,” Takanori sighed, shaking his head. He looked up at Akira, and this time there was that loathing expression again, the one Akira hadn't seen all day. “When I told you Yutaka used to go to our school, and he still lives in the same neighbourhood as me, why do you think he would change schools? Not because his parents moved. Not because the trip to school was shorter. Not because the teachers were better, or because he had friends at that school.”

Akira nodded silently as the realization finally sunk in, and he looked down at the ground and bit his lip. “Because he was bullied.”

“Yes, smart guy. Because he was bullied.” The venom dripping off Takanori's voice scared Akira, and he honestly didn't want to hear more, but Takanori had no mercy and leaned in to whisper in his ear. “Because every day, he was yelled at, thrown shit at, called hurtful things, punched, kicked, beat up so much he came home with me crying. Every fucking day after school I would dab disinfectant on wounds, put bags of ice on swollen eyes and arms and legs and listen to Yutaka crying so much his throat was sore.”

“Stop,” Akira whispered, chewing his lip bloody as a lump grew in his throat.

“He didn't dare tell his parents. They knew. I knew that they knew. He was literally covered in bruises and cuts, and he limped more often than walked. His mother didn't do shit about it, and it didn't help no matter how many times we went to the principal. Because the people who did this had families who refused to admit that their sons were bullies, and they would pay the principal to shut his mouth.”

“Please stop.”

“For half a year, Yutaka was tortured at school, and all the adults around us refused to do shit about it. Until one day he was sent to the hospital, with several broken ribs and a dislocated jaw after two guys from school had beat him up. Yutaka later told me that they had kicked him with steel-toed boots until he was coughing up blood and begging them to stop, while they had yelled at him what a disgusting faggot he was and how they had to beat some sense into him.”

“I said stop,” Akira croaked out, and he fisted his hands so tightly his knuckles went white. He knew who had done that. He knew, because they were his best friends and they had come to him the next day, boasting about how they had sent a disgusting queer to the hospital.

“That day I visited his parents,” Takanori continued, but Akira noticed the quiver in his voice. “I yelled at them that unless they got Yutaka into another school, I would never let Yutaka go. I would keep him in my room all day and all night long, and he would drop out of school and stay with me for the rest of his life. Of course his parents couldn't live with that shame. Their wonderful, smart, perfect little son, quitting school to stay with his gay best friend? When Yutaka got out of the hospital, he changed to a different school. He never asked me about it and I don't know what his parents told him, but he was just grateful to be able to get away.”

A tear slid down Akira's cheek and he wiped it off before it reached his chin, taking a deep breath and straightening his back. He didn't want to know that. He didn't need to know that. He knew how horrible his friends could be, but he always told himself that he didn't have to care, because it didn't affect him. It wasn't his problem. But now it was, and as Akira watched Yutaka, who had been obliviously feeding ducks during the entire ordeal, for the first time in his life he questioned his choice in friends.

“What about you?” Akira must have whispered, because at first Takanori didn't hear, he just cocked his head to the side.

“Did you say something?”

“Do they bully you?” The words hurt to say, but Akira needed to ask. A growing fear was starting to settle in his gut, and he didn't like it at all. He needed an answer, needed to know if he was right in his suspicions, because if he was then someone was going to pay.

“Not as much as Yutaka. They call me names, they've beat me up a few times but nothing serious. They stopped after I hit Kouyou in the head with a bat.”

Akira couldn't help but laugh at that. “Fuck, that was you?! He was complaining about a headache for a week!”

Takanori grinned smugly, adjusting his glasses as he leaned back against the bench. “Yep, that was me. I'm sorry if I'm ruining your dreams of riding over on a white horse and saving your damsel in distress, but I'm not as defenceless as you might think.”

“You're badass. You're the first guy who ever dared do something like that.”

“I refuse to be another one of their victims.”

“Well fuck. That explains why Kouyou hates you so much.”

“Has he said anything?”

“Not really. He sent me a couple of texts, but I didn't read them all.” Akira realised his mistake as Takanori snatched his phone from his pocket and opened it.

“Fuck! Give me that back!” Akira tried to steal his phone back, but Takanori grabbed his arms and held them as he used his other hand to scroll. “I mean it, Takanori. Give me my phone back!”

As Takanori read, his face scrunched up in disgust. He was seething with anger, and Akira shut up for fear of what Takanori would do if he said anything. Suddenly, Takanori got up and threw his phone at him, and Akira barely caught it before it fell on the ground. When he looked up, Takanori was running away, his back turned towards him as he sprinted. Fuck, he was fast.

Akira didn't even try to follow him, in stead he scrolled down to the first texts he had gotten, the ones that he had read already, and started reading from there.

_19/03, 17:36_  
From: Yuu  
This is fucking outrageous. Text me back, Aki. I can't lose you like this. I talked to Kouyou, and the guy you kissed, he's bad. He's evil. You need to stay the fuck away from him. He'll hurt you. 

_19/03, 17:48_  
From: Kouyou  
You can't be gay, Akira. You fucking can't. I'll do anything I can to help you, if you need someone to talk to, I'm here, I'll help you out of it. It's just a phase. You can get over it. 

_19/03, 17:51_  
From: Yuu  
I mean this, Akira. That guy's bad news, he's a fucking dipshit. He's probably just playing you to get your money or whatever, don't believe a word he says. He doesn't love you. No man can love another man. He's just trying to fuck your life up, can't you see that!? 

_19/03, 19:24_  
From: Kouyou  
Look man, I get that you're confused. You probably think you love him but that's just not how it works. It's a man and a woman. A dick and a cunt. He's just trying to brainwash you. I can help you. I won't lose you. I'm not giving up on you, just call me or text me and I'll help you out. 

_20/03, 10:13_  
From: Yuu  
I'm at Kouyou's place. Skip school, come here. We'll help you. 

_20/03, 10:57_  
From: Yuu  
I'm serious. Get your ass over here now or I'll take that as you choosing him over us. Fuck it, haven't I been here for you all your life? Haven't I helped you out with your family? Haven't I been a good friend to you all these years? Are you seriously going to ditch me just for that disgusting queer? You get a choice, Akira. Either you come with us, or you go with him. 

_20/03, 16:24_  
From: Yuu  
You're an idiot, Akira. I knew you were dumb but I didn't know you were such an idiot that you would choose an asshole over your best friends. That's it. You've made your choice. Fuck you. We're not the kind of people you want as your enemies, Akira, but you'll realise that soon enough. You've made the biggest mistake of your life.  
Fucking faggot. 

Akira was furious. He halfway wanted to throw his phone in the pond, but his parents would have killed him. He wasn't a faggot. Yuu was jumping to conclusions. Just because he had a boyfriend who he had happened to kiss a couple of times, it didn't mean he was gay. He just needed a good grade.

What the fuck did Kouyou mean? 'I can help'? What was he going to do, beat the gay out of him, like he had apparently tried to do with Yutaka? Or did he think he could save him from the horrible curse of homosexuality? Everything Akira had heard from his parents, his friends, about sexuality came back to him. Every single word they'd said about how disgusting homos were hit him in the face like a punch. If Kouyou thought he could save Akira then he was an idiot. Akira didn't need saving.

His phone buzzed in his hands, and Akira read the text.

_21/03, 13:11_  
From: Kouyou  
Where are you? You're not at home, and your mother says you're with a friend. Who is it? If it's that little shit Takanori then I'm done with you, Akira. You've betrayed your two best friends for a complete loser. I tried not to give up on you, Aki, but this does it. You're a fucking idiot. 

Just as Akira was about to scream something at his phone, it started ringing. It vibrated in his hand and the screen blinked to show the caller ID. Kouyou was trying to call him. Akira stared at the phone, wanting nothing more than to pick up and yell profanities, but he didn't. He waited. He waited silently until the phone stopped ringing, and then two minutes later he got another text.

_21/03, 13:14_  
From: Kouyou  
You can't hide from me. I'll find you. I'll fucking find you and that little shit and I'll beat you up so bad you won't ever dare betray your friends ever again. When I'm done with you you'll be begging for your pathetic life, begging me to spare you. You can't hide forever. 

Akira closed his phone and put it back in his pocket, taking a deep breath. Shit. Kouyou was looking for him. This was bad. He would never find out where Akira was, it was a Saturday, so he couldn't ask the principal for Takanori's address. But he was right. Akira couldn't hide forever. He had to go back to school on Monday.

Akira's heart was in his throat, and he tried desperately to shove it back down. Stay calm. Breathe. You can talk him out of it. You can convince him that you're still straight. You can tell him the truth if you have to, that you're just pretending to be with Takanori so you'll pass. Having your reputation ruined is nothing compared to having every bone in your body broken.

Yutaka sat down next to him, apparently having run out of bread, and placed a hand on Akira's knee. He bit his lip, awkwardly trying to figure out what to say, and he ended up just asking Akira straight up. “What happened? Where's Takanori?”

“Kou-” Akira coughed and corrected himself. This was not a good time. “Some friends of mine texted me. A lot of homophobic bullshit. Takanori read it and he didn't take it well, so he ran away.”

Yutaka nodded slowly. “He's like that. He probably just needs some time to himself. And you? Are you okay?”

Akira didn't know why he did it. It seemed at that time like the most natural thing in the world to do. Maybe it was because Yutaka was so nice. Maybe it was because he didn't know Akira well. Whatever the reason, for the first time in his life, Akira broke down. He started crying hysterically, slinging his arms around Yutaka's waist and burying his face in his shoulder.

Yutaka rubbed his back, holding him tight while Akira cried. He was grateful that Yutaka didn't say anything. Right then, there were too many emotions, too much confusion, too many questions in his head and Akira couldn't bear it, and so he cried. He cried until there were no more tears to cry, and he just sobbed and clung to Yutaka like he was a teddy bear.

“There there,” Yutaka whispered in his ear, rubbing Akira's back and still hugging him, something Akira was grateful for. “I don't know what they said, but you shouldn't listen to them. Whatever they said, they're just confused and scared of things that are different, things they don't understand. People are like that. They are scared of what they don't know, and some of them just don't handle it very well. They get angry because they don't understand, angry and hurt and cold. And they take it out on anyone who is different. And everything they say, they just say because they're angry. They say it to hurt, but you mustn't let them hurt you. They're just confused.”

Akira sobbed again. “They called me a faggot.”

“But you're not.”

“Aren't I?” As Akira realised what he just said, he stood up, covering his mouth with his hands. He looked at Yutaka, terrified and confused at the same time, before he started crying again. Standing up from the bench, Yutaka wrapped his arms around Akira and hugged him tightly, letting him cry.

“Do you love him?” That question took Akira aback and he wailed loudly, shaking in Yutaka's hold.

“No. Yes. No. I don't know. I don't think so. Fuck!” Akira wiped at his tears and sat down, folding his arms in his lap and staring at them like he expected all the answers to come if he did that long enough. “I mean, he's an asshole and he's a dipshit but he's smart. And funny. And maybe just a little bit pretty but you're never telling him that or he won't shut up for a week.”

Yutaka nodded, and Akira continued blabbering. “And it felt good to kiss him. I mean it did. Really. He sucks at kissing but fuck it Yutaka, I felt something. I felt something I haven't felt before with any woman and it was weird but I can't deny what I felt and it felt good. I never thought lips tasted anything but he tastes like morning dew and I really like morning dew. Really really like it. And I've only known him properly for three days and it confuses the hell out of me. I shouldn't feel this way. And all this time, the only question I'm left with is: am I gay?”

“That was quite a mouthful,” Yutaka laughed, grabbing Akira's hands that were still folded in his lap, and Akira wondered if Yutaka felt the stare he was boring into them. “But whatever happened, whatever you felt, you need to be honest with yourself.”

“I'm trying.”

“I know.”

“I really am.”

“Sometimes, it's not that easy being honest with yourself. You're confused, and I get it, but you need to stop focusing so much on it. You need to stop thinking and start feeling. I know that you're probably overthinking this. I know exactly how you feel now because I've felt the same way. You feel like you don't know yourself, that everything has been a lie, that everything you've ever liked about a woman is irrelevant because it was never true.”

Yutaka chewed his lip before he continued, and Akira wondered how the inside of his mouth looked. “Falling in love is never easy. And it's definitely not easy when you fall in love with someone you would never have expected to fall in love with. You're confused, you're scared, and you're wondering why you couldn't just be normal like everyone else. But falling in love with one guy isn't the same as loving guys in general.”

“I'm not even sure I love him.”

“There you have it. You might not love him at all. You're a teenager, Akira, you're going through puberty. Your hormones are raging and you might feel like you're in love when you're not. What I would advise is that you stop thinking about it and wait. Wait and see. And if you really do love Takanori, then you start thinking.”

“How do I know if I love him or not?”

“You'll know when the time comes. But right now, that's irrelevant. Right now, you need to tell me why you seemed scared out of your mind when I came up to you.”

Akira took a deep breath, grabbing Yutaka's hand.

“Kouyou is trying to find me.” He ignored the frown that appeared on Yutaka's face. “He said he's going to kick my ass.”

“Does he know where you are?”

“No, but I have to go back to school on Monday.”

“But you're strong. Isn't there any way you can win the fight?”

“Not against both him and Yuu.”

“Call the police? Threatening is illegal.”

“They've got the cops by the balls. Nobody dares lift a finger against them, because their parents are rich enough to make one hell of a mess out of it if their sons are falsely accused with something.”

“But it won't be false.”

“Tell that to the corrupt judge.”

“Oh.”

A long silence ensued, during which Yutaka seemed to try to think of a way to solve the problem. In the end, he gave up, and Akira let out a deep sigh. “I'm dead, aren't I?”

“Yes,” a familiar voice came from in front of them, and both Akira and Yutaka looked up to see Takanori standing with his arms crossed, looking furious as ever. “Yes you are.”


	6. Chapter 6

“How long have you been standing there?” Akira snapped, glaring at Takanori, who glared right back.

“Long enough to hear that your best friend is trying to find you.” Akira almost sighed when he realised Takanori hadn't heard him rambling about his feelings. Takanori didn't need to know.

“He went to my house.”

“Did your parents spill the beans?”

“There are no beans to spill. I never told them where I am.”

“Good. Kouyou most likely won't find you. Nobody from school knows where I live, and he's too dumb to look it up on the net.”

Akira snorted as he was forced to agree with Takanori. Yeah, Kouyou would never think about that. “But I will still see him on Monday.”

Takanori stared up at the sky for a while, deep in thought. “We'll think about something. In the meantime, I think it's best for all of us if we just try to forget everything that happened.” And in a second, his face softened and he smiled sweetly. “Anyone want to watch a film?”

Both Yutaka and Akira stared at him in utter bewilderment before a wide grin stretched over Yutaka's face. “Ooh, ooh, can we watch Titanic again?”

Akira noticed the brief look of annoyance that passed on Takanori's face before it softened again. Yutaka didn't. “Sure we can.”

Yutaka was already halfway home, skipping happily while Takanori let a groan slip. “If he annoys you, why do you let him choose?”

“Because,” Takanori started, picking up the bag Yutaka had forgotten on the grass and walking after him. “I like seeing him smile. He deserves it.”

Stuffing his hands in his pockets, Akira trotted after him. He had to agree. Yutaka's happiness was definitely contagious. However, he couldn't help but wonder what was going to happen when he got back to school on Monday. He would have to come up with a plan. Maybe if he made sure to stay near a teacher, Kouyou and Yuu wouldn't dare touch him. Or maybe they just wouldn't give a fuck about the teachers.

He could skip school, sure, but not for the rest of his life. At some point, Akira was just going to have to stand up to them. Take it like a man. No matter how much he wanted to hide away, he knew he couldn't do it forever.

Akira was snapped out of his thoughts as Takanori grabbed his hand, pulling him to walk faster. “Come on, Yutaka is probably making popcorn already.”

~

Akira had never watched Titanic before. He had never given two shits about a film about a sinking ship. It seemed stupid to him. He preferred films with plot, action, something. And he wasn't a big fan of romance. But as Akira sat on the couch with a cup of hot chocolate, forced to watch with threats of getting his balls removed if he didn't, Akira decided one thing for certain right away.

He hated this film.

“I wish I had a boyfriend like that,” Yutaka sighed dreamily as he watched the main characters engage in some sappy dialogue at the front of the ship. “Leonardo DiCaprio is so hot.”

“Even when they're fucking in the car?” Takanori grinned at Yutaka's embarrassed whine.

“Taka!” Yutaka blushed. He was sitting on the floor, wrapped in a blanket. He had ran back and showered off the dirty water from the pond and put on fresh clothes. He was boasting for fifteen minutes straight about how clever it was of him to bring an extra shift, and Takanori had been rolling his eyes at him all the while. Then they had made hot chocolate and sat down in the living room, Akira and Takanori on the couch, Yutaka on the floor, even though there was room for three on the sofa.

Bored and tired of paying attention to the TV, Akira turned slightly to watch Takanori out of the corner of his eye. Takanori was actually watching the film, a relaxed expression on his face. Akira smiled at seeing him so relaxed, arms uncrossed and shoulders down. Takanori was always so tense, he seemed like he was on guard 90% of the time. There were no wrinkles on his face now, and as Akira turned his head to fully look at him, he noticed how pretty Takanori was. His slightly chubby cheeks, the soft slope of his chin, his perfectly shaped nose and plush, inviting lips.

It was true, Takanori was a bad kisser. But Akira loved the taste of his lips. He loved the tingles of electricity that ran through his body when he kissed Takanori. He loved kissing Takanori, but he would never admit it. His pride would never allow him.

The film ended, and they talked for about an hour after that. The conversation was comfortable, Takanori interviewing Yutaka about everything that had happened at school all week and Akira listening with mild curiosity. At some point, the door opened and Takanori's mother came in, smiling sweetly.

“Hello boys. Yutaka, how are things at home?”

Yutaka bowed his head and smiled widely. “Fine, thank you.”

As soon as she had disappeared into the kitchen, Akira turned to Takanori. “Your mother works on weekends?”

“Since dad left we haven't had a lot of money,” Takanori shrugged. “She needs two jobs, or we would lose the house.”

“Oh.” Akira really had nothing better to say. He felt sorry for her. It couldn't be easy, having a child all alone, the responsibility of being someone's support, their idol, their rolemodel, and at the same time trying to balance their finances. It was a wonder she still had the energy to smile.

~

Yutaka had cooked dinner, and although Akira was puzzled, he didn't complain. Yutaka was a good cook. And when he saw the smile on miss Matsumoto's face when she realised she didn't have to make dinner today, he had to smile himself.

Now he was sitting on Takanori's bed, Takanori and Yutaka seated in front of him, chatting lazily.

“Hey guys, how about a game of truth or dare?” Yutaka suggested, and Akira's brows furrowed.

“Isn't that a girl thing? You know, like fixing each other's hair and discussing hot guys?”

“It's a gay thing, too,” Takanori frowned. “Especially discussing hot guys.”

“Really?” Akira couldn't help the sarcastic tone in his voice. “So you two are holding yourselves back now?”

“If you weren't here, we'd be discussing your abs right now,” Takanori nodded, to which Yutaka blushed and ducked his head, and Akira stared incredulously at him.

“What?”

“I told you, Suzuki. You're one of the hottest guys at school and if Yutaka weren't so shy he'd be jealously growling at me right now.”

“Taka, stop!” Yutaka looked like he was about to punch Takanori, and he bowed his head even more, hiding his face behind his bangs. “He doesn't need to know-”

“That you have a crush on him?”

“Had,” Yutaka corrected. “I'm not one to steal away my best friend's boyfriend.”

“Such a gentleman,” Takanori giggled. “So are you up for it or are you going to chicken out, Suzuki?”

“What?” All this while, Akira had been watching them dumbfounded, his jaw about to hit the floor.

Takanori rolled his eyes. “Truth or dare.”

“Oh. Okay.”

“I go first since it was my idea!” Yutaka chirped, and Takanori nodded. “Taka?”

“Truth,” Takanori said with a shrug.

“No fair, I know almost everything about you,” Yutaka pouted. “Is it true that you and Akira kissed?”

Nodding, Takanori turned to Akira. “My turn. Suzuki?”

“Um, truth?”

“Am I the first guy you've ever kissed?”

“Yes,” Akira replied hastily. “Takanori?”

“Truth.”

Akira's question rolled off his tongue as if he had been practising it in his head all day. “How do you know you're gay?”

Takanori looked slightly puzzled by the question, chewing his lip before he replied. “I don't know. I like guys. I find guys attractive. I want to be fucked in the ass by a big dick.”

Yutaka was blushing so much Akira thought his face was going to catch fire any minute, and just then, Takanori turned to him, raising an eyebrow in question.

“Truth,” Yutaka blurted out quickly, making Takanori grin.

“Have you ever had sexual thoughts about another man?”

Yutaka gaped at Takanori until Takanori burst out laughing, clapping his hands in amusement. “Idon'tknowmaybeyes. Anyway. Akira?”

Only too happy to save Yutaka from the awkward situation, Akira hastily answered “truth.”

“Oh come on, it won't be any fun if nobody takes dare,” Takanori pouted.

“Well then why don't you do it yourself?” Akira rolled his eyes before he gave up. “Fine. Dare, then.”

“I dare you to tickle Taka,” Yutaka grinned, and Akira caught on to the evil plan easily.

“No, wait, Yutaka, take that back I-” Takanori didn't have enough breath to say anything else, as he was spending what little he had laughing like a hyena. Akira straddled him and held his arms still with one hand, tickling his sides with the other. “Stop! Mercy! Please!” Takanori yelled between giggles, and when Akira decided he'd had enough, he sat back on the futon, letting poor Takanori catch his breath again.

“Yutaka, truth or dare?”

“Truth?”

“Ummm...” Akira was wondering what to ask when it suddenly hit him like lightning from a clear sky. “Why do you think you suddenly switched schools?”

Yutaka was staring at him wide-eyed while Takanori was desperately trying to signal Akira that that was a bad question. He was waving his hands and making throat-slitting motions, and Akira almost wanted to laugh, but it was drowned out by Yutaka's whispered reply. “Takanori said something to my parents.”

An awkward silence hung in the air for a while, before Takanori gave a slow nod, pursing his lips and shooting a worried glance at Yutaka. “How long have you known?”

“I guess I figured it out a while ago. Since I ended up in the hospital, my parents have hated you. Don't worry. I'm not mad. I just wish you had told me first.”

“I'm sorry, Yutaka. I just needed to get you out of there.”

Nodding, Yutaka chewed the inside of his cheek, and Akira once again wondered how badly injured his mouth really was. “Okay Taka, truth or dare?”

“Dare.”

“I dare you to tell me why you ran away after reading Akira's texts today.”

“No, you can't do that! That's truth!” Takanori protested, but Yutaka shook his head.

“I dared you. You can't refuse.”

After a couple of seconds, Takanori let out a deep sigh. “Because Kouyou and Yuu had texted him and told him they were going to save him from me, that I was trying to 'turn him' or use him for sex.”

Yutaka nodded, patting Takanori's back. “Ignore those jerks. What do they know?”

“Suzuki,” Takanori asked, eager to move on.

“Truth.”

“Why are you still friends with those two?”

It was obvious enough who Takanori was talking about, and Akira's brows furrowed as he glared at Takanori. “Who says I still am?”

“Why were you then?”

“I...” Akira's mouth flapped like a stranded fish, and he looked awkwardly at the floor, biting his lip. “I don't want to tell you.”

Takanori rose a brow. “You have to, it's part of the game. If it's any consolation, I promise I won't tell anyone or judge you for it. I'm just curious.”

Akira took his time, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath before he spoke quietly. “I needed them. My parents kept repeating over and over again that if I didn't get any friends, they would never speak to me again. And I needed social status. I needed people to be afraid of me. I couldn't go to school knowing that I was a potential victim, so what's the best thing to do? Join the bullies. Nobody will dare say anything to you out of the fear of getting their jaw broken.”

“But then it backfired,” Takanori continued for him.

“Yes. Now it did. I thought I could just keep up the façade for another year, pretend I was one of them, but then I got a boyfriend. Speaking of, Takanori, truth or dare?”

“Truth.”

“Why did you make me become your boyfriend?”

“I already told you, Suzuki,” Takanori started, but Akira dismissed him with a wave of his hand.

“You told me you wanted protection, that if I was your boyfriend people wouldn't dare bully you, but today you told me that you don't really get bullied, that you can defend yourself.”

Takanori frowned annoyed at Akira, clearly not having expected him to figure that out. “Maybe I'm just lonely,” he hissed, and they shared a heated glare before Yutaka interrupted them.

“Guys, it's past eleven, should we maybe go to bed?”

“Fine,” Takanori grumbled, stomping off to the bathroom, leaving Akira to stare questioningly at Yutaka.

“He'd never been kissed before he met you,” Yutaka whispered, hoping Takanori didn't hear them. “He's always been curious about what it's like to have a boyfriend. Hand-holding, kissing, all that cute stuff.”

“Oh.” That was the last thing Akira said that day.


	7. Chapter 7

Sunday passed all too quickly for Akira's liking. Yutaka had stayed a little while, but left around noon, and Takanori had been attempting to teach him maths for the rest of the day. Attempting was the word, because as much as Akira had tried and tried, algebra wasn't his friend and he understood little to nothing. At some point, he had wanted to just toss the book out of the window, clutching at his hair and yelling at Takanori in frustration, who had taken Akira's outburst with more calm and sense than he thought he would. After Akira was done ranting, Takanori had calmly explained to him the basics, and talked him into revising some more.

The clock was slowly ticking towards ten when Takanori had closed the book and stared long and hard at Akira. “You need to go home.”

“Excuse me?” Akira looked up from his notes, baffled by Takanori's blunt statement.

“I understand that this weekend wasn't planned, and that you didn't have time to pack anything, but there's only so long you can wear the same pair of boxers.” Akira looked down sheepishly, Takanori raising his hand and shaking his head. “No need to be embarrassed. Me and Yutaka, we can handle three days old stench of man, but you have school tomorrow. You need to go home, get fresh clothes, take a shower, say hi to your parents and let them know you're not dead.”

Nodding slowly, Akira bit his lip. “I know that, but what if Yuu or Kouyou are waiting at the stairs?” He avoided pointing out that his parents probably didn't care either way.

“They're not stupid, they know you have to go to school, so there's no point in waiting at your house when they can catch you tomorrow.” Akira's shoulders tensed, and Takanori's eyes narrowed. For some reason, Akira was extremely reluctant to go home. For once, Akira was showing weakness, and it hurt Takanori to have to send him away when he was acting like a lost puppy.

“Okay, I'll go.”

“I'm sorry.” Akira raised a brow at Takanori's faint whisper, starting to pack his schoolbag. He was out the door in minutes, heading towards the bus station. Just as Takanori had predicted, nobody was waiting for Akira when he got home, and he sighed in relief, going up to his room without greeting his parents.

Even though he went to bed straight away, Akira didn't sleep well that night.

~

Monday morning. Akira had showered, brushed his teeth, gotten dressed, fixed his hair slightly and packed all the books he needed. He had woken up before the alarm, and was ten minutes early for the bus, standing by the stop and waiting in silence.

Akira got off the bus and felt his heart jump in his throat. He had hoped against all odds that they wouldn't be here today, that they would skip school, or both be sick, or something. But he was stupid to ever have thought that they would miss an opportunity to beat someone's ass.

He started walking slowly toward the front doors, and when he was about halfway there, Kouyou spotted him, pulling on Yuu's sleeve. They hurried to catch up to him, and for a second, Akira considered running for it, but he stood still, looking down at the ground to avoid seeing their sickening grins.

“Why hello there, Aki.” Kouyou's voice was dangerously sweet. “You know, we were almost afraid you wouldn't make it today.”

“Please, can we take this somewhere else?” Akira didn't want anyone to see this, especially not any teachers.

“Follow us.” Akira stuck his hands in his pockets, trailing after them as they led him behind the school, to a secluded corner where there were no windows and no teachers could see. Akira knew that corner well. He had spent a lot of his lunchbreaks there, watching Yuu and Kouyou beat freshmen to a pulp, stripping them of their pride, money, anything they could get their filthy claws on.

Wincing as he was pushed against the wall, Akira's hands flew up to shield his face, and he heard Yuu's laughter right next to his ear. “What a pussy you are, Aki. Who would have known? That all this time, you would just be a stinking, disgusting faggot.”

“I'm not,” Akira whispered, flinching as the first punch hit him square in the face, blood spurting from his nose. “I'm not a faggot.”

Yuu was about to hit him again, but Kouyou held his arm, stopping him. “No, let's hear him out. Let's hear what he has to say in his defence.”

Think fast. Akira's head span, trying to come up with anything he could say to make them stop. For a split second, he considered just telling them the truth, but that was a risk to take. Either they would understand his desperate need for a grade, or they would laugh at him and tell him he was pathetic, beating him up all the same.

The second punch came from Kouyou, and made his head hit the brick wall behind him hard enough that his vision went black for a moment. “Come on, fairy. You better have a good fucking explanation, because I refuse to believe that a normal, healthy, straight man would snog a faggot for no reason.”

Kouyou's arm was hovering in the air, his fist clenched, preparing to land the next hit, and that was when Akira panicked. He spurted the first thing he could come up with, a lie that would get him in trouble if Takanori ever heard it. “I'm just playing him.”

Brows furrowing, Yuu gripped Akira's hair and pulled him to look in his eyes. “What was that?”

“I'm stringing him along. I found out what he did to Kouyou and I was so pissed, but obviously violence isn't going to work on that faggot, so I had to think of something else.” The words formed in his head so fast that he barely had time to spit them out, praying that this would work, that he could fool these two, because if it didn't, he would be fucked. “I found out the fucker has a crush on me, so I'm pretending to love him only to break his heart.”

Yuu and Kouyou shared a long look, apparently deciding whether or not they were going to believe him. Akira couldn't believe what he had just said, and even though he knew it was purely self-defence, he felt bad about it. “Break his heart, huh?”

“He's tough, he won't break from violence alone. I figured the best way to really hurt him would be to pretend I was interested, go along with it for a while, only to laugh in his face and tell him what a pathetic homo he really is.”

They burst out in laughter, Akira joining in for the sake of acting, coughing as Kouyou gave him a hard slap on the shoulder. “That's my boy, Aki. You should have told us, though. Or texted us. I really was worried you'd turned.”

“I wasn't sure you would actually believe me. Besides, I can't let him suspect anything.” Kouyou seemed to buy it, and Akira heaved a relieved breath, touching the back of his hand to his nose to register that he had stopped bleeding.

“Now that we're sure you're still with us,” Yuu said, slinging his arm around Akira's shoulder and grinning at him, “you should come to Kouyou's party Friday night. Bring Takanori, tell him it's a 'date'.”

“I don't know...” That probably wasn't a great idea, since he was sure Takanori would never accept.

“Bullshit,” Kouyou spat, furrowing his brows at Akira. “You're both coming.”

Akira nodded reluctantly, making the other two grin and pat him on the back. Clearly, this was a test. Kouyou didn't trust him, and wanted him to show that he was still loyal. Thus, Akira couldn't refuse. The problem would be getting Takanori to agree.

“Great. Catch you later, then.” Akira was left alone in the corner while Kouyou and Yuu left, slouching against the wall. As soon as they had disappeared out of sight, he crouched on the grass, ripping at his hair. “Fuck!” He had screwed up big this time. Sure, he didn't get the shit beat out of him, but if Takanori ever heard of this, his revenge would be much worse.

Akira slung his backpack on his shoulder, starting to walk back to class while trying to think of a way he could spend time with Takanori without making Yuu or Kouyou suspicious of him. The rest of the year was going to be a nightmare.

~

He didn't meet Takanori in the lunchbreak. He didn't feel like it. He felt like he had betrayed Takanori. Not only that, he was scared.

He was scared that Takanori would somehow find out about this, that either Yuu or Kouyou would tell him that Akira was playing with his heart. Not that Akira thought Takanori actually had any interest in him, he just didn't want to lose his tutor. So in stead, he had joined Yuu and Kouyou, trying to gain their trust by helping them beat up some nerds. It wasn't anything personal. He didn't have anything against these people, they were just his insurance. He needed to make sure that everyone thought he was still friends with Yuu and Kouyou. And gay. However that worked.

“It's not like you to be this quiet, Aki.” Kouyou turned towards him, fist full of shirt as he held a freshman above the ground, ignoring the squirming and kicking boy completely. “Something on your mind?”

“I'm just tired. It's Monday, for fuck's sake! Cut me some slack.” Laughter filled the air, except the poor freshmen who were bleeding and whimpering on the ground weren't laughing. Neither was the tense form of Takanori, standing behind the nearest corner watching.

~

“There you are!” Akira was in the men's room, washing the blood off his face when the door slammed open. There were still five minutes left of lunch break, and Akira was trying to clean his face. Only half of the blood was his, his nose was bruised, and Takanori walked up to him, inspecting his face closely. “I've been looking for you all day.” Akira's reply was a tired grunt, splashing some water in his face. “What happened?”

Akira rolled his eyes incredulously, trying to mask the fact that he was piss scared. Hopefully, Takanori would think the blood on his face was from getting beat up by Yuu and Kouyou. “What does it look like?”

“You're not in the hospital, so I don't know.”

“They used to be my friends, you know. They probably went easy on me.” Akira hung his head over the sink, hoping he could lie to Takanori as well.

Takanori huffed and crossed his arms, looking at the blood stains on the sink. “So, what did they say?”

“What do you think they said?” Akira's voice must have held a lot of exasperation, because Takanori narrowed his eyes and stared him down in challenge.

“I think they told you to stay away from me.”

“I don't suppose you'll let me.”

“No.” Takanori was still glaring so hard Akira felt his skin prickle, but he didn't waver in his composure even as he straightened out and looked back at him through the mirror. “We have a deal, Suzuki. I've spent my free time tutoring you, and I want something out of it.”

“And I almost thought you were just being nice to me.”

“Why should I?” Takanori shrugged and shifted his weight to the other foot, looking at Akira with loathing as he spoke his next words. “You deserve it. I don't give a rat's ass about what your friends do to you.”

“Do you really think they're my friends any more?” Then Akira realised something, and he turned around to face Takanori, crossing his own arms. “Yet you came here looking for me.”

“I needed to know if they had beat you up bad enough that you would chicken out. For whatever reason, they're scared of me. I don't know why, but I know that they won't touch me. You, however...” His lips curled up in a grin, and he raised his chin confidently, as if speaking to someone inferior. Honestly, Akira felt inferior at that moment. “I just wanted to make sure they hadn't scared you off. Because the second you stop keeping your end of the deal, it's off, Suzuki.”

Akira grunted and ran his fingers through his hair, looking down at his shoes. “What about this weekend? Are you going to lie and say you didn't enjoy yourself?”

“But that's exactly it, genius. You're my boyfriend, which means you pamper me, keep me company, and make me feel good. All that in exchange for me helping you not get kicked out of your house.”

His lips tightened and Akira felt almost sick in his stomach. He felt angry, betrayed... used. How dare Takanori do that to him? Treat him like trash, use him only to please himself, take advantage of how vulnerable Akira was? It was unfair. “So basically, I'm your whore.”

“And all I came here for, ” Takanori grinned, walking up to Akira and standing on his toes to whisper in his ear, voice dripping with venom and disgust as he continued, “was to make sure that you still are.”

He turned around and walked out swiftly, leaving Akira staring down at the floor, back tense and fists clenched as he blinked away the moisture in his eyes.

~

Pens scribbled against paper, the sound extremely unnerving. Akira wasn't writing. He was staring at his blank paper and contemplating throwing his pen. He didn't detest Japanese class. He did alright, good enough for his parents, but right now he didn't have the mental capacity to write. All he could think about was the fix he had gotten himself in, and how the hell he was supposed to get out.

He had fucked it all up in one morning, but looking back, he couldn't really have done it any differently. He considered himself lucky not to have any broken bones at this point. In his panic, he had lied to keep himself from ending up in hospital, but now that he thought about it, the lie wasn't all that stupid. It was believable. The problem was convincing Yuu and Kouyou while not letting Takanori find out.

If either Yuu or Kouyou told Takanori that Akira was just pretending, Takanori would most likely call off the deal, and this entire charade would be pointless. Which in itself was ironic, because Akira was pretending. He didn't love Takanori and he wasn't his boyfriend. He assumed the same went for Takanori. For a second, Akira wondered if Takanori would even care at all, but he snorted at himself and shook his head.

Yeah, he would. Even if Takanori didn't care about Akira, he didn't want Akira to betray him. And if Akira did as Yuu and Kouyou now thought he would, and pretended to fall in love with Takanori only to laugh and tease him for it afterwards, he didn't suppose Takanori would be very happy about it.

But Akira didn't plan to do that, did he? At this point, he wasn't really sure. What was he going to do after he graduated? Would Takanori want him to keep pretending? Or would Takanori tire of him even before that? 

“Suzuki.” Akira was startled out of his thoughts and looked up to see the teacher raising an eyebrow at his blank paper. “You haven't written anything in half an hour.”

He scratched the back of his head sheepishly, smiling up at the teacher. “I'm sorry, sensei, having a bit of a writer's block.”

The teacher snorted, unimpressed and turned to walk back to his desk. “You think you're funny, huh? Well, if you can't finish the assignment in class, it'll be your homework.” He sat down in his chair and narrowed his eyes at Akira, drumming his fingers on the desk. “I'll expect it by tomorrow.”

Akira's face dropped and he nodded quickly, chewing his lip. Okay, better start writing then.

~

“Akira! Dinner!”

Groaning, Akira rolled over in bed, staring up at the ceiling. “Coming, mother!” He had finished his homework as soon as he came home from school, falling down on the bed and dozing there since. He had heard his parents coming home, conversing quietly while his mum was making dinner. He didn't look forward to seeing them. He wished they would just leave him alone, but at the same time, his stomach was screaming for food, so he supposed he might as well go and eat.

He made his way down the stairs, plopping into his seat and sighing loudly. His mother raised an eyebrow at him. “You didn't come home all weekend.”

Akira's brows furrowed and he stared at the table. Why would his mother even care? “You said you didn't want me to.”

“Friday night, I didn't. But you should have come home and cleaned your room, helped me out and washed the bathroom or something. You never do anything in this house, and it wouldn't kill you to actually contribute to this family.”

“I never do anything?” Akira forced himself to swallow his words before he said something he would regret. “I help out when you ask me to.”

“Then where were you this weekend?” Akira's father joined him by the table, his chair screeching as he pulled it out.

“At a friend's.”

“It better not have been a girl.” His mother sounded concerned, as if she expected him to have had sex. “I really hope you used a condom.”

Akira should have replied something else. He should have said 'I didn't have sex', or 'I always use condoms', but he was tired and his brain wasn't functioning well, and so he blurted out something entirely different. “Would it be any better if it was with a guy?”

He realised his mistake quickly, cursing inwardly before looking up, meeting the horrified gazes of both his parents. “Excuse me?” His father looked like he was about to kill someone. “Take that back, right now!”

His father's words made Akira furious, and he stared down at his plate. He bit his lip against the anger and started speaking slowly, trying to keep himself from sounding sarcastic out of fear that his parents might see it as rude. “All I'm saying is, what if I wasn't at a girl's place this weekend? What difference does it make if it's a guy or a girl I'm screwing?”

Chairs fell over as Akira's father stood up abruptly, making his way towards Akira, and Akira shot out of his own, running up the stairs with his father on his heels. He slammed the door and locked it behind him, just in time before his father started banging on it while shouting from the other side. “How dare you say something like that in my house? And you call yourself my son?”

Akira kicked the door, successfully making his father shut up, but the next words that were uttered were worse than the noise of banging fists against wood. “If you ever say something like that again, you will be out of this house faster than you can say 'college', is that clear?” Akira's fists clenched, and he gritted his teeth against any reply. “Don't come out of there until you regret what you said.”

The sound of footsteps descending the stairs rung out in the uncomfortable silence, and then the growling of Akira's stomach. Not like he had any appetite any more.

He went to bed without another word.


	8. Chapter 8

“You're late, Matsumoto.” Takanori looked up and sent the teacher an angry glare, and he furrowed his brows. “Just go find your seat and be quiet, please.” Takanori nodded and hoisted his backpack higher up. Feeling the stares of his classmates, he slumped further and walked slowly to his desk, ignoring the hushed whispers from the back.

He didn't really pay attention to the teacher. No matter how hard he tried to avoid thinking about it, he was constantly reminded of Akira, and it made his gut churn. Had he gone too far? Teasing him was one thing, but calling him a whore? He might have stepped out of line, but then Takanori remembered what had happened earlier and the anger was back.

That Akira would have the balls to lie to Takanori just like that... Takanori wasn't stupid. He had seen Akira in the lunch break, “hanging out” with Yuu and Kouyou, and it made him wonder, were they even mad at him at all?

The text messages they had sent to Akira in the weekend, they had been real. Takanori knew that, and he also knew that Akira had been genuinely scared to meet them, but now it seemed ridiculous. Had they simply forgiven him? Impossible. So, Takanori concluded, either they were trying to fool Akira, or they were trying to fool him.

And if it was Takanori they were after, that meant Akira couldn't be trusted. Most likely, they had some sort of plan, and whether they had told Akira or not, it couldn't be good news for Takanori. Those two were never good news. Either way, the smartest thing for now would be to just lay low, try to find out what they had up their sleeve, and avoid any possible scheme of theirs.

Then again, there was also the possibility that they actually believed Akira was still straight. Who knows, maybe Akira had managed to convince them? It wasn't unthinkable. They were stupid enough to believe something like that if he said it, but if that was the case, then there was a perfect counter for it.

Takanori grinned to himself, raising his head again to try and seriously pay attention. If Yuu and Kouyou genuinely believed Akira was straight, then all Takanori had to do was convince them of the opposite, even if it meant making out with Akira on national TV. Nobody could spoil this for him now.

~

It was five in the morning when Akira eased his bedroom door open, peeking left and right before he tiptoed out of his room. Backpack hanging off his shoulder, he made his way down the stairs as silently as he could, stopping abruptly as one of the steps creaked, holding his breath and listening for any sounds from his parents' room. The silence remained unbroken, and he heaved a sigh of relief, continuing out the front door, locking it behind him as quietly as possible.

Once his feet hit the pavement outside, he took off in a sprint, running as fast as he could until he was far away from his house, not stopping until he reached a small park. He slipped in and fell down on the nearest bench with a heavy thud, panting heavily as he caught his breath.

His father was pissed. That was obvious enough. Where the hell should he go now? Not home. Not to Yuu's or Kouyou's. Which left only one option, and although it was a long shot, Akira was willing to risk it.

It was almost six when he reached his destination, and he was surprised to find that the lights were on already. He rang the doorbell and waited, bowing deeply when Takanori's mother appeared in the door, looking confused as ever.

“Akira-kun, what are you doing here at this time of day?” She smiled sweetly, and Akira noticed that she was already wearing her work clothes. He wondered briefly just how early she had to get up in the morning.

“My father is mad at me,” Akira said and bowed once more for good measure. A pitiful frown appeared on miss Matsumoto's features, and Akira wished it would go away. “I don't want to be there when he wakes up.”

“Well, come on in, don't stand there in the cold like an idiot!” Akira thanked her and followed her to the kitchen, taking a seat and yawning loudly, rubbing his tired face. “Did you get any dinner?”

Akira's stomach growled at the mention of food, and he hung his head in defeat as he realised that he hadn't eaten anything in over twelve hours. He shook his head, to which Takanori's mother clucked her tongue and went to look in the fridge.

“Well then you must be starving, poor thing! I'll make you some breakfast, how does omelette sound?”

Thus, when Takanori entered the kitchen almost an hour later, Akira was stuffing his face full of delicious, home-made omelette, happily chatting with his mother about some TV series. Needless to say, he froze in the door with an expression somewhere between disbelief and confusion, pointing an accusing finger at the still eating Akira.

“What are you doing here?”

Akira shrugged and swallowed down a mouthful. “Good morning to you too.”

Takanori's frown increased, and he was gripping the doorframe so tight his knuckles were turning white. “I said what are you doing here?”

“Eating breakfast. It's delicious, want some?” Akira nodded towards his plate, Takanori shaking his head. “What's the matter, sweetheart, aren't you happy to see me?”

“His father was mad at him, so he came here in the grey of the morning, cold and hungry,” Takanori's mother supplied, completely oblivious to Akira's sarcasm. “I'll make bento boxes for the two of you, and then you can take the bus together.” She turned to Akira next, a concerned expression on her soft features. “And Akira-kun, if you don't want to go home tonight, you're more than welcome to stay here.”

She didn't see the furious glare Takanori sent her way as Akira bowed his head and thanked her.

~

“What happened?” The bus ride had been awkwardly quiet so far, Akira staring out the window and Takanori tapping his foot. He was chewing his lip and staring at the ground as if he was deep in thought, and Akira almost didn't register that he had said anything at all.

There was no point in lying to Takanori, so he didn't. For a moment, he thought that maybe, he would have told Takanori anyway just to have someone to talk to, but that sounded weak, and Akira wasn't weak. He just didn't feel like he could come up with any more lies in such a short amount of time. “My parents asked if I had been at a girl's place this weekend, and if I had used condoms.”

“I swear, if you told them you have a boyfriend-”

“I didn't.” Akira ignored the glare Takanori sent for interrupting him, sighing heavily as he chewed on his words. “I asked them what difference it made if I fucked a girl or a guy.”

“I didn't take you for an idiot, Suzuki. It seems I overestimated you.” Even through the spiteful words, Akira sensed the concern.

“I'm not an idiot.”

“Then why did you insinuate to your homophobic, straight-A parents that you might be bi? That's not exactly what I would call a smart move.”

Akira snapped his next words with such aggravation that even Takanori shut up. “I know that!” He took a deep breath, realising he shouldn't be yelling on a bus. “I don't know why I said it.”

“Why did you, then?” Takanori sounded reasonably irritated himself, and his knee was shaking so fast Akira clasped his hand over it to keep it still. Both he and Takanori stared at the hand, until Akira awkwardly placed it back in his own lap. “You are straight, right?”

“Of course.” Akira placed his elbow on the windowsill and rested his chin in his hand, looking out of the window. It had taken a lot of contemplation, but Akira had eventually figured out why he had pissed off his father like that. Somewhere deep inside he had doubted what Takanori and Yutaka had told him. He didn't think they would lie to him, but at the same time he didn't believe that someone would leave their own family over something like their son's sexuality. Sure, he understood that it was a big deal for people like Kouyou and Yuu, but everything was a big deal to them. They took everything they could use against someone and bullied them for it, no matter how small or insignificant that thing was.

Parents, however, were different. Akira always imagined they'd love their kids enough to look past minor things like that, so when he found out that Takanori's father had left both his son and his wife because Takanori was gay, it had seemed unlikely to Akira at first. If you really loved someone, would you give them up over something stupid like that?

So maybe what he did yesterday had been his own little experiment. Sure, he knew his parents didn't care much about him anyway, but they didn't usually yell at him, or cause a scene at dinner. The amount of disgust he had seen on his father's face had scared Akira. He couldn't remember seeing him that angry since the last time he failed a test. And it had prompted him to ask the question; why? Why would he get so mad just because Akira was fucking a guy? No, he wasn't gay, and he didn't want to have sex with a man. The thought made him want to puke, but Takanori wasn't a horrible guy. Even if Akira didn't want to fuck him, it didn't mean he automatically hated Takanori just because he liked men. It made no sense and had no purpose, so Akira didn't understand it.

He wanted to understand. He wanted to understand how it was possible to hate someone so passionately for who they loved, but all he had achieved was pissing his father off. He didn't understand any more than he did yesterday, but at least now he knew it was possible. For a brief second, he pitied Takanori, but it didn't last long.

The bus pulled to a halt, and Takanori jumped out of his seat. “See you later.” Before Akira could even reply, Takanori was out of the bus and on his way to school already, and all he could do was take his backpack and follow in the same direction.

~

Akira jumped in his seat when his phone vibrated in his pocket. Shit, had he fallen asleep? He looked around the empty classroom, before his gaze stopped at the clock. He narrowed his eyes to see the time, yawning and stretching his arms, hearing the satisfying snap in his joints. He had slept through half of class and most of the lunch break, and for a moment he wondered if his teacher hadn't seen him, but he knew she must have. His Japanese teacher was a young woman who had a soft spot for Akira, and he didn't doubt that she preferred to just let him sleep rather than waking him up.

He fished his phone out of his pocket and checked his messages, frowning at the screen. His mother was warning him not to come home. His father was still pissed, and she thought it was better if Akira gave him some time to cool down. Great, that meant Akira had no place to sleep tonight. Sure, Takanori's mother had offered, but he would be damned if he stayed there any longer than he had to. Especially since Takanori seemed to be in a bad mood today.

Rolling his eyes, Akira started typing a message to Yuu. Yuu's family didn't seem to mind him too much, and after all, Yuu was still his friend, right? Akira shook his head and sighed at himself. Of course he was. Even with everything that had been going on lately, both Yuu and Kouyou were still his friends, as they had always been. They knew that Akira's relationship with his parents was strained, and probably wouldn't think too much of it if Akira said he had ended up in an argument with his father and didn't want to come home. It wouldn't be the first time.

Akira pressed the send button and tapped his fingers on the desk. Only a couple of seconds after he had sent the text, his phone buzzed with a reply.

24/03, 12:04  
From: Yuu  
No problem. I'll just pull out an extra futon or something.

Akira smiled to himself. Although a lot of things had changed in the past week, Yuu still stood up for him.

~

Akira walked out of the school, rubbing his face and looking around to see if he could spot Yuu. He had slept in his last class as well, but somehow he was still tired, and the week had only just started. He flinched when he heard a familiar voice right behind him, turning around and coming face to face with Takanori. “I didn't see you at lunch.”

“I was sleeping. Were you looking for me?”

Takanori raised a brow. “You should sleep at night, Suzuki, rather than sneaking into other people's houses.”

“I wasn't sneaking. Your mum invited me in.”

“At six in the morning. Not exactly the most common time of day to come for tea.”

“Well I'm sorry that I'm not masochistic enough to want my father to beat the living shit out of me.”

“Then why did you provoke him in the first place?”

“I'm not gay.” The answer came so quickly that it startled them both, Takanori staring wide-eyed at him for a long moment before furrowing his brows.

“I never said you were.” Akira didn't reply, just turned around to avoid Takanori's piercing stare, but the stupid asshole didn't give up. He walked around Akira to stand in front of him, crossing his arms over his chest. “People only defend themselves when they have something to defend.”

“Fuck you, I'm not gay.”

“You keep saying that. Are you trying to convince me, or yourself?”

“Hey, Aki!” Akira let out a relieved sigh as Yuu walked up to them. If Yuu could shut Takanori up, then he was more than welcome. “My parents will be here in five minutes, should we stop by the conbini before going home?”

“No thanks, I don't need anything.” He was pretty sure he still had a toothbrush at Yuu's place, if his mother hadn't thrown it out.

“Home?” Takanori grabbed Akira's arm, pouting up at him, and Akira had to force himself not to swat him off like a fly. “My darling is sleeping at another man's house tonight?”

“Wouldn't want to bother your poor mum any more.” Ruffling Takanori's hair, Akira turned around to leave, but Takanori pulled on his sleeve, turning him around and wrapping his arms around his neck.

“How about a goodbye kiss before you leave, then?” Akira wanted to slap him so bad, but he restrained himself. Rolling his eyes, he bent down and pecked Takanori's lips quickly, not missing how Yuu averted his gaze. Apparently satisfied, Takanori grinned and waved at him as he started walking to his bus.

“Fuck, that must be disgusting,” Yuu said as soon as Takanori was out of hearing range. “I have no idea how you put up with that.” Akira simply shrugged. “Well, should we get going?”

~

“You're not eating, darling.” Akira sighed and picked up his chopsticks, poking them around in the bento box Yuu's mother had made for him. They had been up almost all night playing video games, and it had been refreshing for Akira to have a night where he could pretend everything was normal. But inevitably, morning had come, and they had been shooed off to school. And if Akira thought he was going to get another lunch break without Takanori annoying him, he was sorely mistaken.

“I'm not that hungry.”

“My hubby should eat more. If you don't eat your lunch, your blood sugar will be low and it will be difficult for you to pay attention in class. You want good grades, don't you?” Akira didn't want to see Takanori's smirk. He knew it was there, but if he didn't see it, he could pretend it wasn't.

“I need to talk to you after school.”

Takanori looked surprised for a second, but then he hid it behind another infuriating smirk. “Oh, honey, you don't need to lie. I know you just want to spend more time with me.” Takanori got off the bench just to sit in Akira's lap, starting to play with his hair. Akira resisted the urge to hit him. “You can come home with me, and we can do our homework together, sound good?”

For lack of any better option, Akira agreed, frowning when Takanori took his chopsticks, picking up a lump of rice and bringing it up to Akira's lips.

“Say 'aah'.”

~

Akira threw his backpack on Takanori's futon, turning around to glare at him. Takanori shook his head with a small grin. “You look like someone just stained your favourite shirt.”

“I look like I'm about to murder someone,” Akira corrected with a huff.

“Oh, I'm sorry, did I wound your masculinity? Would being annoyed by a stained shirt be too homosexual for you?” Before Akira had the chance to defend himself, Takanori waved his hand dismissively. “You said you needed to talk. Talk.”

Pursing his lips, Akira tried to think of a way to persuade Takanori to come with him on Friday. Easier said than done. Akira wouldn't be very eager to spend an entire evening with a bunch of people who hated him, either. He wouldn't blame Takanori for saying no. But then again, hopefully he would understand that if he didn't agree, Akira would be in trouble. “I need a favour.”

“Another one? Last time you asked me that, you ended up in quite the mess.” Takanori's sarcasm may have been there, but his annoying grin wasn't. It took Akira a while to realise that Takanori understood that he wasn't kidding around. He may be a dick, but he knew when to be serious, Akira would give him that.

“We're invited to a party on Friday night.” Out of the corner of his eye, Akira saw Takanori crossing his arms and narrowing his eyes. “At Kouyou's.”

Takanori shifted uncomfortably, glaring at Akira with suspicion and fear. “The hell do you mean 'we'? Last time I checked, he hated me and wanted me as far away from him as possible.”

“Well, I'm invited and he told me to bring you as my date.” Akira winced as Takanori growled and took a step forward, staring him down.

“What did you tell him?”

Akira's mouth narrowed to a line, and he stared unblinkingly at the wall. “I have no idea what you're talking about.”

“From what you're telling me, he knows we're a couple, and is still your friend. Considering this is the same guy who sent you threats just for kissing me, I find it just a little bit hard to believe that he simply accepted the fact that you're gay. So I'll ask again, how did you pull that off?”

Several minutes passed, during which neither of them said anything. Takanori was staring at Akira with his arms crossed, waiting for an answer, while Akira stared at the wall. Eventually, Akira gave up and simply sighed, shaking his head. “Look, do whatever you want, but I have to show up, with or without you.”

Takanori chewed on his lip for a second before he unfolded his arms, picking Akira's backpack up and fishing out his maths book. “I'm coming.”

Akira snapped his head up to stare at Takanori in utter disbelief, Takanori handing him the textbook as if nothing was wrong. “Just like that?”

“You'll be in trouble if you come alone, right?” Akira nodded, and Takanori took a deep breath. “I may not like you, but I don't want you to end up in the hospital. I would feel bad annoying you if half your face was bandaged. Besides, I'm pretty confident neither Kouyou nor Yuu would try to touch me, and even if they did, I'll have you there to protect me.”

Bowing his head, Akira's voice was one of relief and gratitude. “Thank you.”

Takanori gave a satisfied smirk, adjusting his glasses and brushing a strand of hair behind his ear. “Now, let's do your homework.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Additional warning: this chapter includes underage drinking and someone's drink getting spiked without their consent. Also some dubiously consensual sex, so be careful reading. If you feel like I left out any warnings, PLEASE let me know in the comments so I can tag it appropriately and we can avoid anyone getting triggered.

“I need to call my mom.” Akira sighed in defeat, setting the book aside and grabbing his phone.

Takanori nodded, and Akira left the room without another word. He remained seated for a few minutes, until he heard the muffled sound of Akira's voice from the living room. He got up and quietly eased the door open, pressing himself to the wall and sharpening his ears. He knew eavesdropping wasn't polite, but curiosity got the better of him.

“No, I didn't mean to- Of course mother. Yes, I know.” Takanori furrowed his brows, disappointed that he still couldn't make out much of the conversation. “I'll come home tomorrow. Tell him I said I'm sorry.” Akira hung up and stuffed the phone into his pocket, and Takanori tiptoed back to his room quickly. He pretended to be looking out of the window when Akira got back, closing the door behind him.

“So, what did she say?”

“I can come home tomorrow, if I promise to be good and never mention what happened. Don't worry though, I packed clean underwear this time.”

“Well, that's a relief. Should we finish?”

Takanori frowned when Akira didn't answer, turning around and ready to come with a sarcastic comment when he saw how Akira's head was hanging in defeat. There were a thousand things he could have said in that moment, he could have teased Akira for being a baby, for not having his emotions in check, but he said nothing. He simply walked over and wrapped his arms around him, hugging him tightly. Akira froze for a moment, before resting his head on Takanori's shoulder and letting out a deep breath.

After well over a minute had passed, Takanori let go of him and took a step back, giving him a questioning look. “So, Suzuki. Maths?”

Akira gave him a sceptical look before nodding. He didn't want to bring up their conversation from earlier. He had no idea how much Takanori had figured out on his own, but it was pretty obvious they both knew something was up. He had been a fool if he didn't expect Takanori to find out at some point. He was certain to come up with something to make Akira uncomfortable soon. That, and then there was the looming threat of what Yuu and Kouyou could be planning.

Sighing deeply and sitting down on the floor, Akira crossed his legs and picked up his book. “You know, maths is boring as hell.”

“They won't get any more fun just because you complain.”

“I know, but it makes me feel better.”

“Do you want to pass or not?”

“I do.”

“Less talk and more calculations.” Takanori picked up a pen from his desk and sat down next to Akira, staring at his notes, pointing to an equation. “This is wrong, by the way. You're supposed to divide first.”

Akira really wanted to murder him.

~

School had gone by pretty fast. It wasn't like Akira hadn't been paying attention during lectures, he just had a lot on his mind. Now he was on the bus home, worried about how he was supposed to act around his parents and what he was going to do about tomorrow. He had never really been the partying type, and he definitely wasn't looking forward to it now that he was bringing his boyfriend. At least he was safe as long as he was still friends with Yuu and Kouyou. Nobody would lay a hand on him. Takanori, however, was a different matter.

Why did Kouyou want him there in the first place? No way would he insist on Akira bringing Takanori unless he had some sort of plan. He wouldn't try to lay a hand on Takanori with so many people around, especially not when Akira was there. He would have to protect Takanori whether he wanted to or not.

Then again, maybe that was Kouyou's plan all along? Forcing Akira into a situation where he had to choose between Takanori and his friends? If so, that meant he didn't believe Akira when he said he was just playing Takanori.

Bottom line, Akira had no idea what was going to happen the following day, and it was scaring him more than it should have. If it had been up to him, he would have been quiet and subtle about this all, let Takanori do his gay things at school and pretend everything was normal when he came home. He only wanted to survive the rest of high school. It was already March, he wouldn't have to put up with this charade much longer.

Even if he never wanted it to, eventually the bus pulled up to the right stop, and Akira hopped off and slung his backpack over his shoulder. His parents would be home in an hour, and by then he intended to tidy his room and vacuum at least the kitchen. He didn't want to give his father any reason to be disappointed.

He was in the middle of cleaning the bathroom when his mother came home, calling for him to come help her with the groceries. “Welcome home, mother.” He bowed stiffly and took the bags, carrying them inside and starting to fill the fridge.

“Have you done your homework?” Akira's mother entered the kitchen, leaning against the counter and watching Akira work.

“All done.”

“Good boy.” She paused for a long while, lips pursed and eyes narrowed, and she opened her mouth before closing it again. She chewed on her words before speaking out, voice trembling slightly. “Please don't anger your father like that again.”

Akira stiffened, hanging his head and staring at the counter. “I didn't mean to. I just asked a question.”

“You shouldn't ask those kind of questions. He gets mad, and then he blames me for being a bad mother, and-” She didn't finish her sentence, because by that time, Akira had finally gathered his thoughts enough to read between the lines. He turned around in a flash, his hands coming up to cup his mother's face as he inspected it closely, frowning as he spotted a fading bruise under her eye. It was partly covered by make-up, but still visible if you knew what you were looking for.

She pushed him away, avoiding eye contact as he stared her down. Finally, Akira threw his hands up in defeat and went upstairs. He tried to subdue his anger, but to no avail. He was pissed, at everyone and everything, but most of all, himself. He couldn't help but think, maybe if he had stayed, maybe if he had let his father beat him up in stead, his mother wouldn't have ended up like that.

He did eat dinner with his parents that day. He sat quietly and listened to his father ramble on about work, answered politely any questions he had about school, and bit his tongue whenever he had the urge to say more. But it didn't stop him from sending his mother worried glances during the entire meal, watching the fear on her face whenever he talked. It was the first time he had realised that she was truly scared of her own husband, and Akira wondered how many times it had happened before without him noticing.

~

Takanori was eerily quiet at lunch. Normally, he'd be talking the ears off anyone willing to listen, but today, he was quietly poking a tomato with his chopsticks, rolling it around in his lunchbox. Akira watched for a long while, and Takanori didn't even seem to notice. “Why are you so quiet today?”

Akira was shocked when Takanori looked up at him, expressionless face and blank voice, free of the usual malice and disgust he made sure to coat his words with every time he talked to Akira. “I'm thinking about tonight. I need an emergency plan in case something goes wrong.”

“Nothing will go wrong,” Akira assured, more to himself than Takanori. Takanori shrugged his shoulders and continued poking his tomato.

“What if they gang up on me? I can't defend myself if several strong guys are holding me down.”

“They won't.” Takanori gave him a look that said 'are you an idiot', and put his chopsticks down on the table, staring blankly at his food. “Even if they try, I'll protect you.”

“Are you so sure about that, Suzuki? Think about how much it could cost you if you defended a faggot. Your reputation would be ruined.”

“What do you take me for? I won't let them touch you.”

“Why am I so different?” The irritation was back in Takanori's voice, and his fists were clenched tightly in his lap. “You have watched your friends beat up probably half the school's students, even joined in sometimes, but suddenly you say you're going to defend me? Why? And don't give me any “you're my boyfriend” crap, we both know you don't actually give two shits about that at all.”

Akira licked his lips, staring down at his knees in shame. “I need you. You're a good teacher and I'm desperate to pass maths, so I need you. Is that what you wanted to hear?”

Takanori leaned over the table and grabbed Akira's collar, pulling him close so their faces were merely inches away. Akira's eyes widened in surprise, while Takanori gave him a harsh glare. “Stop lying to me,” he hissed out through gritted teeth, letting go of Akira's shirt before someone noticed what was going on, standing up and slinging his backpack over his shoulder. He walked away before Akira had a chance to say anything else, leaving him alone by the table, mouth half open in disbelief as he watched Takanori's back.

~

“So, Aki, you coming tonight?” Akira nodded, and Kouyou grinned satisfactorily. “And you're bringing the fairy?”

“He's coming.” He wanted to ask Kouyou what he was planning, but since he didn't know yet if those plans included him or not, he decided not to.

“Good, I'll see you, then. I need to go home and get ready, make sure my parents bought enough booze. I can't wait to get sloshed.”

Akira sent him a wide smile, waving as he left. Getting drunk sounded like a good idea. Maybe he could forget about everything for a while. At least there was something positive about this whole day. He turned to the entrance to see people still pouring out of the large doors, all heading home, and he knew he would be seeing quite a few of them tonight. He spotted Takanori in the crowd, running to catch up to him. “I'm going home with you first, unless you mind?”

Takanori shook his head, and they got on the bus together in silence.

~

They were standing in front of Kouyou's large house, having brought nothing but phones and bus cards. Akira knew Kouyou took care of everything anyway, and they weren't planning to sleep over. There were buses still running in the middle of the night, though he was pretty sure they were leaving early. Akira took a deep breath and looked at Takanori, who was just as tense as him, if not more. “You ready?” he asked, just as much to himself as to Takanori.

Takanori pursed his lips and nodded. “What's the worst that could happen?” He smiled and shrugged his shoulders, but neither of them were convinced. They walked up the few steps to the door and Akira rang the doorbell, Kouyou opening it with a wide grin.

“You made it!” He ushered them in, kicking the door shut behind them and giving Akira a tight hug. He smelled strongly of beer, and Akira resisted the urge to recoil. “And you brought your boyfriend as well.”

Even as Kouyou turned to him with a triumphant smirk, Takanori stood his ground, raising an eyebrow. “I only came because my hubby wanted me to.”

“At any rate, try to enjoy yourself. It's Friday night, time to let loose and forget about school. I'll be around if you need me for anything, there's drinks and snacks in the kitchen, help yourselves.” He left them alone in the hallway, heading further inside. Takanori stood awkwardly, shifting his weight from one foot to the other.

“Come on, let's make the best of it.” Akira smiled and took Takanori's hand, guiding him to the living room. “Thirsty?”

“Not really.” Takanori let himself be dragged along. It was safer with Akira anyway. He just wanted to know when he could leave. Akira led them to the kitchen, and Takanori snatched a handful of chips from one of the counters. Akira went to the fridge, taking out a bottle of beer. Takanori raised an eyebrow at him as he took a long swig, chuckling to himself. “You drink?”

“Now and then.” Akira wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and leaned against the counter. “I think I'll need it tonight.” Takanori nodded in understanding, stepping closer to Akira as the door opened.

“Oh hey, Aki.” Yuu smiled at them both, pulling out two beers from the fridge. “Why are you two in the kitchen? Party's out there.”

Takanori pressed himself to Akira's side, and he wrapped an arm around Takanori's shoulders. He was shaking with fear, and Akira squeezed him closer. “We were just looking for something to eat.”

“Take whatever you want, Kouyou's parents filled the fridge before they left. I have to get back to my date.” He winked before leaving again, beers in hand.

Akira bent down to whisper in Takanori's ear. “You're scared.” Takanori drew a shaky breath and pushed Akira away.

“Bullshit. Now come on, we don't want to seem suspicious.” They went back to the living room, finding an empty couch to sit down on. Takanori cuddled up against Akira, deciding his best bet was to stick as close to his boyfriend as possible. At least this way he didn't feel like a sitting duck in a room full of hunters. He stared down at the table in front of him, trying to ignore the curious looks people sent his way.

Akira finished his beer and went up to get another one when Takanori pulled him down to whisper in his ear. “Get one for me too, Suzuki.”

He nodded silently, returning only a minute later with two bottles, handing one to Takanori. “You sure about this?”

“I can't handle the tension any more. Besides, this might be my only chance to drink before legal age.” The grin that accompanied his words was forced, and Akira furrowed his brows.

“You've never had alcohol before?” Takanori shook his head, lifting the bottle to his lips and smelling it curiously. “Dude, don't you dare get wasted. I'm not carrying you home.”

Takanori shrugged and took a swig of his beer, narrowing his eyes at the unfamiliar taste. “It can't be that bad.”

They sat like that in silence for a good hour, Akira keeping an eye on Takanori as he slowly finished his life's first beer. He had just downed the last of it when Kouyou was in front of them with two new bottles, setting them down on the table and flashing a crooked smile. “Thought you might want another. Having fun yet?”

Takanori sent him an icy glare, and Akira cleared his throat, handing a bottle to Takanori and taking the other one for himself. “Thanks.”

~

At least three beers and another hour later, they were still in the same position, having refused to move a single inch out of fear that someone might jump them. Takanori was twitching uncomfortably when Akira nudged his shoulder, giving him an annoyed look. “What's wrong?”

Takanori stared down at his knees, patting them gently. “I gotta piss.”

“Then go.”

“I don't know where the toilet is.”

Akira rolled his eyes and got up from the couch, stuffing his hands in his pockets and trying to act nonchalant. “I'll show you.” Takanori got up, immediately sitting down again as he couldn't balance on his own two legs. He leaned on the table and slowly hoisted himself up to a standing position, swaying lightly on his feet for a second before daring to take a step, Akira grabbing his arm and hauling him in the direction of the bathroom. “I told you I didn't want to carry you.”

“Didn't think I would get this drunk.” They slowly climbed up the stairs, Takanori supporting himself on the railing. They reached the door and Takanori nodded in thanks.

“Think you can do it on your own without falling into the toilet and drowning?”

“If you want to, you could always hold my dick for me,” Takanori retorted with a smirk, getting in and closing the door behind him before Akira had time to respond. He came out five minutes later, nearly stumbling onto Akira, who leaned him against the wall, making sure he could stand on his own before letting go of his shoulders.

“My turn. Don't go anywhere.”

“As if I can.” Takanori stared at a dot on the wall opposite him until it became two dots, which then split into four. He blinked a few times, trying to focus his vision when Akira emerged from the bathroom, one hand on his forehead. “What's wrong?” Takanori asked with a frown.

“I feel dizzy.”

“You should lay down. So should I, actually. Is there a guest room here?”

Akira nodded and draped an arm around Takanori's shoulders, the two supporting each other as they made their way down the hall. Akira opened the door to one of the guest rooms, locking it behind them as Takanori fell face first onto the bed. It was large enough for two, and luckily it wouldn't be their first time sharing a bed.

Takanori flinched as he felt Akira embracing him from behind, burying his nose in Takanori's hair. “You smell good.”

“Oh, and I'm the one who's drunk?” He giggled briefly and rolled over onto his back, startled to see that Akira was wearing nothing but his boxers. Not only that, but there was a definite bulge there. “Suzuki?”

Akira leaned down to touch his lips to Takanori's neck, running his tongue along the smooth skin, successfully shocking Takanori silent. “I want you.”

Gathering all the self-restraint he had, Takanori pushed the drunken Akira off him, eyes widening in disbelief. “That's the alcohol talking.” His voice trembled and he tried to get up, only to be pushed down again by a strong hand.

“Then what do you think this is?” Akira grabbed Takanori's wrist and guided his hand down between his legs, rubbing the palm of Takanori's hand along the front of his boxers. He moaned at the light contact to his dick, his erection twitching, and no doubt Takanori could feel it even through the thin material.

Takanori tried to pull his hand away, but Akira forced him to keep rubbing, and he tried pinching Akira's shoulder to get his attention. “You're drunk, Suzuki. And you need to stop right now before you take it too far.”

Akira growled and let go of his hand, placing his hands on either side of Takanori's head and leaning down so their lips were mere centimetres apart, whispering against them. “I want to fuck you.”

They stared into each other's eyes for a long moment, Takanori's wide open, a mix of shock and desire on his face. Then Akira closed his eyes and kissed him hard, nipping at Takanori's bottom lip. There was no hesitation, and finally Takanori relaxed, kissing him back with just as much passion. Their mouths clashed together again and again, until Akira's hand found its way between Takanori's thighs.

“Suzuki!” Takanori's moan was cut short as Akira's tongue invaded his mouth, seeking his own and playing with it briefly before he pulled away and licked along Takanori's bottom lip. Takanori gasped for breath as Akira continued stroking his cock through his jeans, thumbing the button open and sliding them off his legs easily.

Akira kissed the inside of Takanori's thigh, making him moan breathlessly. A wet tongue travelled up his leg and traced the outline of his erection through his underwear, and Takanori gasped in surprise. His boxers were quickly removed as well, and he wrenched off his shirt with ease, leaving him completely naked. “I swear Suzuki, if this is some kind of joke, I will-”

“It's not.” For some stupid reason, Takanori believed him. He propped himself up on one arm, tangling his fingers in Akira's hair and pulling him in for another kiss. Their lips met and parted several times before Akira pushed Takanori back down on the bed, leaning over to rummage through the drawers of the bedside table.

Takanori was shocked when Akira pulled out a condom, tearing the wrapper and rolling it on his dick. He was about to protest when Akira stuck two fingers into his mouth, sucking on them lewdly and making Takanori forget everything he wanted to say. He circled his index around Takanori's hole, looking up at him for permission.

No sooner did Takanori nod than Akira pushed the first finger in. He bit his lip and threw his head back, a loud moan escaping him as the finger wiggled further inside. Akira thrust it in and out gently a few times, letting Takanori get used to the feeling, before adding another. He scissored them slowly, stretching Takanori and opening him up. He watched Takanori's face for his reaction, frowning as he suddenly shrieked, hips jerking upwards. “Do that again.”

Akira tried to remember where he had pressed, rubbing his fingers against the same spot again. Takanori let out another loud moan, biting down on his wrist to muffle the sound. Akira eased a third finger in, thrusting them slowly and making sure to get the angle right, drawing more pleasured noises from Takanori's lips.

Pulling Akira's face down, Takanori kissed him softly before laying back down, grabbing Akira's hips instead. “I want you inside me.” Akira nodded, grabbing his dick and positioning himself at Takanori's entrance, lifting his hips for easier access.

“Ready?” Takanori nodded and Akira pushed inside him, groaning as tight heat enveloped him. He buried himself to the hilt and leaned forward, kissing Takanori's chest to try and calm him down. “Just focus on my lips.” Takanori was breathing heavily, trying to adjust to the stretch, taking Akira's advice and trying to think only about Akira's mouth and the warm tongue that teased his nipples.

After a while, it became less painful, and Takanori wrapped his legs around Akira's waist. “Move.” He hissed as Akira pulled out and thrust back inside, grabbing Akira's shoulders and digging his nails into the soft flesh. His mind was spinning with confused thoughts of why Akira was doing this, what his secret agenda was, but then Akira started to fuck him, and all conscious thought left Takanori in a heartbeat.

“Harder, Akira." Akira grunted and sped up his thrusts, leaning down to bite and lick at Takanori's neck, muffling his low groans against Takanori's soft skin. Takanori was moaning loudly, nearly screaming with pleasure as Akira changed his angle and started hitting his prostate with every thrust. He held onto Akira's back for support, probably scraping his skin in the process but it didn't seem that Akira minded.

“You feel so good Taka,” Akira whispered, reaching between them to stroke Takanori's cock in time with his thrusts. Takanori mewled, feeling his orgasm approaching and trying to hold back as long as he could. He wanted this to last forever, it felt so good he wanted to melt in Akira's arms. He clenched his inner walls tightly, loving the pleasured sounds he could draw from Akira's lips, loving how utterly lost in pleasure he looked as he threw his head back and jerked his hips with frantic desperation.

Takanori screamed Akira's name as he came with another hard thrust to his prostate, feeling Akira pulse inside him as he came, both of them moaning and panting in the aftershocks of their orgasms while they shared wet, sloppy kisses. Akira plopped down on his back next to Takanori, pulling the condom off and throwing it on the ground next to the bed without a care in the world.

“Shit, Suzuki.” Takanori contemplated bugging Akira about his sexuality, but decided that now was definitely not the time. He heard a soft snore and turned his head, chuckling to himself as he saw that Akira had already fallen asleep. Pulling the covers over them, he snuggled up to Akira and closed his eyes, falling asleep almost immediately.

~

“Hey Kou, have you seen either of the fags?”

Kouyou gave Yuu a puzzled look. “Akira's not a fag. Yet.”

“You know what I mean.”

“Actually, no, I haven't. They disappeared a while ago.”

“Well I've checked everywhere on the ground floor, so they must have gone upstairs.”

“But the only rooms upstairs are bedrooms.” Kouyou narrowed his eyes before grabbing Yuu's arm, dragging him up to the first floor in a hurry. “Fuck, I must have switched their drinks! I'm an idiot!”

Yuu shrugged Kouyou's hand off him, stopping in the middle of the staircase and staring at his friend. “What are you talking about?”

“I slipped a little something in Matsumoto's beer, but now that I think about it, I might have given him the wrong bottle.”

“Why did you do that?”

Kouyou rolled his eyes and sighed. “Because I thought if I got him a little loosened up, he might make a move on Akira. I wanted to know how he would react, if he would push that faggot away or just put up with it. At the very least, Matsumoto would embarrass himself and probably have a horrible headache tomorrow.”

“So who ended up with the spiked beer?” Chewing his lips, Kouyou looked away in shame, avoiding Yuu's gaze. “Kou?”

“I think I gave it to Akira in stead.”

“Kou... what exactly did you give him?”

They both looked at each other for a long moment before the graveness of the situation hit them both, and they dashed up the stairs and to the guest bedroom. Stopping outside the door, Kouyou pressed an ear against the wood, although it wasn't really necessary. Takanori's moans were loud enough that they could hear him clearly from a distance, even over the booming party music from downstairs. Yuu looked down at the floor, blushing furiously. “It could be someone else.”

Just then, Takanori moaned Akira's name, and they both stepped away from the door as if it were on fire.

“That is fucking disgusting,” Kouyou said with a deep frown.

“I think I need to throw up.” Yuu gave Kouyou an angry glare, punching his shoulder. “Fuck, why do you have to be so stupid?”

“Never mind.” Kouyou's face lit up and he grinned, starting to make his way back downstairs. “I think we can turn this to our favour.”

“Our best friend is fucking a faggot in your guest room. How exactly can this turn out good?”

“Because Matsumoto doesn't know that he's been drugged.”

“Kou, I'm too drunk to figure out what you mean by that. Can you please stop being cryptic and just explain?”

Kouyou stopped in the hallway and pulled a cell phone out of his pocket. “I have Akira's phone, with Matsumoto's number on it.”

Realization dawned on Yuu, and he couldn't stop the smirk from forming even if he had wanted to. “Oh.”

“Exactly. So for now, let's enjoy ourselves. Tomorrow, we have a heart to crush.”


	10. Chapter 10

Akira winced as he opened his eyes, the sharp sunlight nearly blinding him, and he pulled the covers over his head. Wait. Covers?

He ripped the duvet off and threw it on the ground, staring at his naked body in shock. Why the hell was he not wearing any clothes? And why was he still in Kouyou's house? He was planning to have a few drinks, politely excuse himself and go home before anything happened. He tried to remember when he had gone to bed, but it was all just a jumble of memories he couldn't piece together. The last thing he remembered was sitting on the couch next to Takanori, drinking.

Takanori. Where was he? Had he somehow managed to sneak home last night? Akira knew he wouldn't get any answers just by lying in bed all day, so he got up and picked his clothes up from the floor, pulling them on slowly. He groaned as his head throbbed with pain, and made his way downstairs and to the kitchen, surprised to find that the house was more or less clean already.

“Good morning, sleepy head.” Akira turned to see Kouyou smiling at him, handing him a glass of water and a pill. “Aspirin. I assume you have a really bad headache.”

“Thanks.” Akira slipped the painkiller into his mouth and downed the water, giving the empty glass back to Kouyou. “What time is it?”

“Nearly three. We let you sleep, figured you needed it.”

“'We'?”

“Yeah, Yuu stayed behind to help me clean. I need the house to be spotless by the time my parents are home, you know that. We're nearly done.”

“Hey, Kou...” Akira scratched the back of his head, a little embarrassed that he couldn't remember much from the night. “Why did I wake up in your guest room? Naked?”

Kouyou laughed and patted Akira's back soothingly. “I carried you to bed when you got a little too sloshed. You complained about being warm, so I helped you undress, nothing more.”

“Fuck, you better not have touched my dick.” Akira smiled, glad that Kouyou still took care of him, that their friendship was still solid enough that they could joke around like they used to.

“Fuck no, that's gay. I'll leave that job to your boyfriend.”

Akira tensed at the mention of Takanori. “Where is he?”

“He left earlier. I think he passed out on the couch or something.”

“Oh.”

Yuu entered the room with a crooked grin and a tray of empty beer bottles, raising an eyebrow at Akira. “You wouldn't actually let him touch your dick, would you?”

“No way. Not if he grew a vagina on the spot.” Kouyou and Yuu started laughing, but Akira cringed. He still didn't feel quite comfortable with this whole situation. “By the way, where's my phone?”

“In the kitchen. Come on, let's get you something to eat.”

Breakfast consisted of cold pizza and leftovers from the previous day, but it tasted like heaven to Akira. When he thought about it, he hadn't eaten a proper dinner yesterday, so the food was more than welcome. The three friends sat by the kitchen table, chatting and laughing and eating until it was already five o'clock, and Akira excused himself, saying that he had to go home. He grabbed his phone, double-checked that his bus card was still in his pocket, and left.

“Poor Aki,” Kouyou said, locking the door and turning around to lean against the frame. “I feel bad for lying to him.”

“It's for his own good. Do you want to tell him he ended up having sex with Takanori? Because you slipped drugs in his beer, might I add?”

“Shut up, Yuu. I didn't do it on purpose.”

“Whatever. Did you get the number?”

Kouyou grinned and pulled out his cell phone, waving it in the air. “I have Matsumoto's number saved on my phone. Oh, and I deleted a text Akira got this morning.”

“Takanori texted him?”

“Yep. Said he was sorry and hoped Akira didn't regret it, and something about him liking it very much. Whatever. I didn't bother reading it all.”

Yuu laughed and shook his head. “Poor, pathetic little guy. Doesn't he know Akira never texts his one night stands back?”

Kouyou chuckled and stuffed his phone back into his pocket. “Now all we need to do is plan the final details, and we'll be ready tomorrow.”

“It will feel so good to finally get back at that faggot.”

“You said it.”

~

Akira arrived home by some miracle, with nothing more than a slight headache and a little nausea. He managed not to trip and fall down the stairs, pressing the doorhandle, slightly annoyed at finding it locked. He rang the doorbell twice before banging loudly on the door, wincing as the sound hit his eardrums, making his head throb. “It's me, I'm home!” he yelled, hoping either of his parents was home to hear him.

He sighed in relief when he heard the door being unlocked, stiffening as the door opened to reveal both of his parents standing just inside, his mother with her arms crossed over her chest. “You promised you would be home yesterday.”

Akira bowed deeply. “I'm sorry, I got a little more drunk than I thought I would and crashed at Kouyou's. He took good care of me, though. I'm okay, I even got breakfast.” He tried to sneak past them and inside, but his fathers arm on his shoulder stopped him, and he swallowed thickly, turning his head to meet his father's disapproving gaze.

“Did you do something stupid? Take any drugs? Fuck anyone?”

“No, father. I promise, I just had one too many beers.”

“Fine.” He let go of his shoulder, Akira bowing multiple times before heading upstairs as quickly as he could. He locked himself in his room and crashed on his bed, closing his eyes and resting his head on the pillow.

He couldn't shake the thought that there was something he had forgotten. He had a strange feeling that something had happened, but he couldn't quite pinpoint what. Something must have happened at the party, but Akira couldn't remember it. In fact, he couldn't remember much after his third beer. He knew he didn't drink much, but he wasn't usually that out of it after only a couple beers. Somehow, he must have gotten sloshed, because he couldn't remember shit from yesterday, and it bothered him.

He woke up a couple hours later to a loud knocking on his door, then his mother's voice from the other side of the wood. “Please wake up, dinner is ready.” Akira grunted and got up, rubbing his eyes as he yawned, realising he must have fallen asleep while trying to remember what had happened. He went to open the door, squinting at his mother, who averted her gaze immediately. He didn't say anything about the dark bruise on her cheekbone. He didn't have the energy.

~

Takanori lay on his futon, the side of his face buried in his pillow. He remained in the same position he had been in since he came home on Saturday. He had refused to answer his mother's concerned questions, assuring her again and again that she didn't have to worry, that nothing dangerous had happened, before retreating to his room. Now it was Sunday evening, and he had only moved from the bed to eat and go to the toilet, otherwise staying in the same position, simply staring at his phone.

Regret and guilt washed over him, and he pushed it away, like he had been doing for the past twenty-four hours. It wasn't like he had expected Akira to suddenly turn gay, either. Hoped, maybe, but not expected. He wasn't that stupid. And yet he didn't avert his eyes from his phone, hoping against hope that maybe Akira would text him back. It wasn't a big deal. They had fucked, Takanori had texted him, Akira hadn't replied yet. It wasn't a big deal, so why was he so anxious about it?

Takanori heaved a deep sigh. It was a big deal. He had never had sex before. Akira was his first boyfriend and his first fuck, and even if that meant nothing to Akira, it held some value to Takanori. Not necessarily because he was head over heels in love with Akira, but because at least it was decent to text someone back after you fucked them. Maybe he was stupid to think that Akira, the school's playboy, would text him back. Akira only ever had one night stands, so Takanori was deluding himself to think it was something more, but the least he expected was a text.

Takanori shook his head, trying desperately to stop thinking. His thoughts were going in circles, and he didn't like the conclusion. If he was going to be completely honest with himself, on some level, he did care. Akira had taken his virginity and that had to mean something. The least he could do was answer the goddamn message.

Takanori groaned and fisted his sheets tightly. He should have said no, should have told Akira to just jerk off and go to sleep. He should never have let it go too far. Akira was probably regretting it, wanting to forget the entire incident happened, if he even remembered it in the first place.

The number one rule was to never get involved with a straight or bi-curious man. Takanori knew that. He knew it well and that was why he internally cursed himself for what he had done. Playing Akira's boyfriend was one thing, there were no actual feelings involved in that, but having sex with him? That was something entirely different. Takanori wasn't like Akira. He couldn't just fuck someone he didn't have any feelings for. He didn't want to have that kind of intimacy with just anyone, which made it that harder to swallow the fact that he had said yes to Akira. Some part of him wanted to believe it had been the alcohol making him agree, but deep down, he knew it was more than that.

Don't fall for someone who's straight. That was the number one rule, the principle Takanori had decided he would never break, for the sake of his own safety and health, and he had gone ahead and broken it. No, he wasn't in love with Akira, but even so, Akira was hot. He was hot, he could be nice when he wanted to, and he was pretty much Takanori's type. All that added to the fact that they'd had sex, and Takanori's staring contest with his phone made sense. He just wanted a reply from Akira, some sign that he wasn't absolutely disgusted by what had happened. Was that too much to ask for?

Takanori nearly jumped from the bed as his phone buzzed, the screen lighting up. He took a deep breath and lifted his phone to his face, only to be utterly disappointed when he didn't recognise the number. Akira's number was saved on his phone. This wasn't Akira. He let out an annoyed huff, but went to check the message anyway.

_29/03, 18:51  
Hey, Matsumoto. Kouyou here. Just felt like I should tell you something before I let this go too far. I didn't mean to hear you guys on Friday, but you were really loud._

Takanori blushed furiously, one hand coming up to cover his mouth. No way. Kouyou knew that they had sex? Nevermind that, how the hell did he have Takanori's number?

_I know what happened. I can't say I like you, but you don't deserve to have your heart crushed, so I felt like you need to know. Akira doesn't love you. He doesn't have feelings for you at all, he detests you and thinks you're disgusting. If I know him right, he was just hard and used the closest means of relief, which happened to be you. I'm sorry man, I don't know how to break it to you, but Akira's just trying to get you to fall for him. He doesn't give two shits about you. He kept laughing all morning yesterday about how pathetic you are, how you're probably all giddy because you had sex and hoping it will become something more. Don't let him break your heart._

Takanori nearly hurled his phone at the wall, but he knew his mother wouldn't be able to pay for a new one. In stead, he set it next to him on the floor and rolled over, burying his face in his hands. Warm tears flowed steadily down his face, soaking the pillow beneath him as he tried not to cry loudly.

Okay, so maybe he did have some feelings for Akira, after all.

~

Akira really hated Mondays. At least his hangover had passed and his parents weren't too pissed at him. He had called Kouyou and asked him how it went with his parents, and he had cheerily replied that they hadn't found anything wrong with the house, and they were just happy that he had fun. Akira called him a lucky bastard and hung up, checked over some of his homework, and gone to sleep.

He was going to take the rest of the year seriously. No more skipping classes just because they were boring. No more flunking on a test he could have passed just because he didn't read. He only had a couple months left and he could be out of there, moving on to a different school, but that was only going to happen if he graduated, and therefore he was determined to pass all his classes.

He paid attention during the first two lessons, doing all the tasks assigned with strong determination. He was surprised to find that he even understood some of the things the teacher wrote on the whiteboard during maths, and he silently thanked Takanori.

The bell rang, signalling that it was time for lunch break, and Akira headed to the cafeteria, surprised that Takanori didn't meet him on the way to follow him. He ate his food and talked to a couple of his friends, discussing a new game that was coming out soon with Yuu and Kouyou, and they agreed to have a marathon together sometime after the release.

He didn't notice until the lunch break was over that he didn't see Takanori anywhere. It was strange, Takanori had always been there during lunch breaks to take advantage of their agreement and see how uncomfortable he could make him. It wasn't like Akira missed him, it was just that it seemed out of place, and now he was curious about where Takanori might be.

He was headed back to his class when he spotted Takanori a little further ahead in the hallway. “Takanori!” He called out to his back, surprised when Takanori started walking faster. “Hey, wait up!” He ran to catch up to Takanori, but he didn't slow down his pace, the two of them nearly sprinting down the hallway in a race. Akira was faster, however, and eventually caught up, grabbing Takanori's arm and holding him back, turning him so he would face him.

“Hey, I didn't see you all day.” Takanori was staring at a point on the wall behind Akira, avoiding eye contact. “Takanori?” Takanori's mouth pressed into a thin line, and he continued staring ahead. He didn't try to run away, but he didn't meet Akira's gaze or otherwise acknowledge his presence. “Hey, talk to me, what's wrong?”

“You want to know what's wrong, Suzuki?” Akira took a step back, surprised at the sheer hatred evident in Takanori's voice. It was the first time he'd heard Takanori sounding genuinely furious, and he was shocked silent. “I think you know very well.”

“I have no idea what you're talking about. Did something happen?”

Takanori turned to meet Akira's gaze, and Akira winced, regretting having spoken. Takanori looked positively murderous, and Akira wanted to turn around and run. “Yeah, something happened. You fucking betrayed me, that's what happened!” Takanori took a deep breath to stop himself from screaming, taking a step forward, Akira taking one backwards to keep him at a safe distance.

“What's wrong, Suzuki? I'll tell you what's wrong. You're fucking playing me, that's what's wrong.”

Akira could feel his throat clench. Oh god, how did Takanori find out? Did Yuu or Kouyou tell him? He opened his mouth, about to explain how that was a lie he had come up with to avoid getting the shit beat out of him when Takanori grabbed a fistful of his shirt, pulling Akira close.

“Think it's fun, Suzuki? Playing around with faggots? I have feelings, you know. I'm not some fucking test. I'm not your little experiment. I'm not your whore, and I am certainly not just a one night stand for you to get off, so you can shove that idea up your ass.”

“Wait, what?” What did Takanori mean? One night stand?

“Oh my god, I don't believe you.” Letting go of Akira's shirt, Takanori brushed his hand through his hair, a look of utter disbelief flashing on his face before his expression warped back to pure malice. “You can't just fuck me to play with my feelings, Suzuki!”

“I have no idea what you're-”

Akira didn't finish that sentence, because Takanori planted his fist right in his face, making Akira take a step back and hold his jaw, groaning in pain. “No, fuck you, Suzuki! I'm done with your little games. I know sex doesn't mean anything to you, but you took my fucking virginity!” Takanori's voice was starting to tremble, and he ignored the tear that trailed from the corner of his eye down his cheek. “Oh, and you should know, the only reason why I even bothered with this whole charade to begin with was because I wanted to get back at Yuu and Kouyou. I was using you to make them uncomfortable, to make them suffer as they watched you kiss me, seeing their best friend slowly get turned, but I guess the joke's on me now.”

Akira stared, dumbfounded, his mouth half open as his brain desperately tried to process the words. He and Takanori had sex? What?

“You dumb fucker, don't just stand there and gape at me.” Takanori kicked Akira in the shin, making him double over in pain, and Takanori kneed him in the stomach. “Fucking leave me alone. I hate you!”

Akira could only watch in confusion as Takanori ran away from the school, a steady stream of tears falling from his face.

“What?” 


	11. Chapter 11

So, that plan to not skip any more classes this year? Yeah, Akira had failed already, but in his defence, he probably wouldn't be paying attention even if he attended. In stead, he had grabbed the books he would need from his locker and trotted away from school, his mind completely blank until he reached a small park. He shrugged his backpack off his shoulder and sat down on the grass, staring at his crossed legs for several minutes before he dared to think about anything at all.

Unless Takanori was lying just to screw with his mind, they had ended up having sex on Friday. And as much as he hoped it was a lie, Akira knew it was hard to fake the emotions he had seen on Takanori's face earlier. Takanori was pissed, he was furious, he was hurt, and Akira didn't blame him one bit, nor did he doubt that Takanori was being sincere.

It explained a lot. It explained why Akira had been naked when he woke up on Saturday. It explained why Takanori had left and not talked to him since. It explained why Akira couldn't remember shit from that night. The only thing he couldn't comprehend was why.

Obviously, Akira had been drunk. That was his excuse for ending up in bed with a guy, and honestly, it was as good an excuse as any. He hadn't had sex in weeks, in fact, he hadn't even jerked off in a while. He had been so smashed he couldn't remember the night, so it was entirely possible he had gotten frustrated and taken it out on Takanori.

What didn't make sense was why Takanori had agreed. Akira knew himself, even drunk he wasn't that much of an asshole, he wouldn't force himself on someone who didn't want him, so Takanori must have said yes, and that was what puzzled Akira beyond reason. Why would Takanori have sex with him? Sure, Akira was aware that he was an attractive man, but Takanori hated him. Why would you fuck someone you hated? That made no sense. It made no sense, and that fact alone was enough to convince Akira that deep down, despite all the disgust and repulsion Takanori regarded him with, Takanori must have cared.

Was Takanori in love with him? Akira shook his head. No, that couldn't be it. Infatuation, maybe, but Akira wasn't stupid enough to believe Takanori loved him. There were other reasons to have sex with someone, right?

Akira decided to discard that train of thought for the time being. The topic only confused him, and he didn't want to be confused any more, so he moved on to the next issue at hand. Akira struggled as he tried to remember Takanori's exact words.

_"The only reason why I even bothered with this whole charade to begin with was because I wanted to get back at Yuu and Kouyou."_

Whether that was the entire reason or there was more to it, Akira couldn't be sure, but he didn't doubt that it was at least partially true. If he was honest with himself, he should probably have been more sceptical. Maybe in the beginning he could fool himself into believing that Takanori's sole motivation to help him out with maths was that he wanted Akira to act as his boyfriend. He didn't believe for one second that Takanori had done it out of his good will or pity for Akira. Akira didn't want to be pitied. He wasn't that stupid. He wasn't good at maths, but that didn't make him stupid enough to deserve pity.

To the point. Point was, now that Akira had gotten to know him better, he didn't think Takanori was actually so desperate to get a boyfriend that he would bribe someone into a relationship. Takanori was smart enough to understand that that wouldn't last in the long run, and that he couldn't force someone into falling in love with him. Using Akira to make Yuu and Kouyou uncomfortable, however? Now that sounded like something that sly bastard would do.

Akira wasn't bothered by the thought that Takanori had been using him for some revenge game. Maybe he should have been a little bothered that the people Takanori was trying to get revenge on were his best friends, but that was between them and Takanori. To be fair, Akira had been using Takanori just as much. He didn't want to lose his pride over admitting to his friends that he needed help with maths, so he picked a genius kid who he thought he could trick into doing the job for him. So they were both using each other. It was only fair, wasn't it?

Akira's shin ached, and he realised that he would most likely get a bruise tomorrow. He deserved it. Forget who was using who and to what end, their agreement had worked perfectly until Friday. And although Akira couldn't remember the details, all evidence suggested that he and Takanori had sex. That was a fact he had to face. And if he put himself in Takanori's place, he understood him perfectly.

Akira was straight. Takanori was gay. Even if they had both been drunk off their wits, they had fucked. On Takanori's part, that made sense. On Akira's, it didn't. Akira wasn't gay, so he understood that sleeping with Takanori would make it seem like he was either playing him or just using him. Takanori could easily have jumped to those conclusions, and that alone justified the aching jaw and the pain in Akira's leg. In fact, he felt like he deserved much worse, but being self-destructive now wouldn't do him any good.

He understood, clear as day, why Takanori was pissed at him. And he couldn't say it was just a misunderstanding either, because he wasn't sure if it really was. He didn't have sex with Takanori to play with his feelings, or tease him. But he wasn't beyond having sex with Takanori just because he was frustrated and horny. The frustrated part was self-explanatory. He hadn't had sex in weeks. He couldn't remember anything from Friday night, so it wasn't entirely impossible that he had ended up getting horny, and, for some weird reason he couldn't quite comprehend, had sex with Takanori.

It gave him a headache to think about. He wasn't gay. He probably could have fucked any girl he wanted at that party. He could have chosen anyone else, but instead, he had chosen Takanori. That had to mean something, right? Akira couldn't quite imagine what exactly that could mean, but it had to mean something.

As for Takanori, he was gay. He probably couldn't have gotten laid with anyone other than Akira, so on one hand it would make sense that he went for him, but then again, why at all? Takanori wasn't like him. Takanori didn't seem the type to just have a one night stand for the pleasure of it. Only hours ago, Takanori had screamed at him that he didn't want to have sex with Akira just to get off, so then what was the point?

Suddenly, nothing made sense again. No matter how many times Akira went through the facts in his head, no matter how much he thought back and forth about it, he ended up with the same conclusion. He didn't have the foggiest clue why he and Takanori had fucked, and he felt like if he thought about it any more, he would start to doubt quite a few things about himself, and he didn't want to. He knew he was straight.

_“People only defend themselves when they have something to defend.”_

Takanori's voice echoed in his head, and Akira shook his head, trying to shoo the bastard out of his thoughts. He was done thinking about him. Everything was confusing, but at least Akira was sure of one thing. He was straight.

_“You keep saying that. Are you trying to convince me, or yourself?”_

“Leave me alone!” Akira looked up, realising he had just screamed in the middle of a park. People were giving him concerned looks, and he grabbed his backpack and quickly got up, hanging his head in embarrassment. “I'm straight,” he mumbled to himself, ignoring the voice at the back of his head. He didn't want to think any more about him. It was just making him confused, so he gave up on thinking and decided to walk home and go to bed.

~

Tuesday passed, and Akira didn't see Takanori all day. He thought he was just avoiding him, but then he didn't see him on Wednesday either. On Thursday, during lunch break, he looked everywhere, but he couldn't find him.

It wasn't like Takanori to just skip like that. Akira didn't claim to know a lot about Takanori, but what he did know was that the kid was a genius who took school way too seriously. He got top grades in all his classes and hadn't skipped a single lesson. Akira knew, because last year the principal had made a list of all the pupils that had been present to every class that year, and Takanori had been one of the three names on that list.

Akira made his way up the stairs to the teachers' lounge. If Takanori really hadn't been to school since Monday, that was a reason to be concerned. He knocked on the door, bowing politely when someone opened it. “Excuse me, is the teacher of class 2C present?”

“One minute.” The guy went back inside, and Akira waited for a couple of minutes until Takanori's teacher, a nice old lady who always smiled to everyone, emerged.

“Can I help you?”

Akira bowed again. “Has Takanori Matsumoto been at school today?”

“Actually, he hasn't been here since Monday. Any particular reason you're asking?”

“Just wondering.”

He was about to turn around and leave when the teacher gripped his arm, furrowing her brows as she looked at him with an expression Akira couldn't quite read. “This is the first time he has skipped school. Do you have any idea what has happened to him? Is he sick?”

Akira shook his head. “I have no idea, Ma'am.”

“Oh, okay.” She looked almost disappointed when Akira turned and left.

~

A knock sounded on Takanori's bedroom door, and he lifted his head briefly from where it was buried deep in his pillow. “Go away!”

“Honey, Yutaka is here,” came his mother's voice through the door.

Takanori wiped a few tears and let his head fall back onto the futon. “Why?”

The door opened, and Yutaka peeked his head into the room, frowning at the sight of Takanori sprawled out on his stomach, face down on the bed. “Because your mother called me.”

Takanori looked at him briefly before turning his head towards the wall. He knew Yutaka would notice the redness of his eyes and realise that he had been crying. He didn't have the energy to care. “Go away.”

Those words stung, but Yutaka ignored it. He knew that Takanori only pushed people away when he felt weak, and besides, he wasn't the one who needed comfort right now. “She said you haven't been at school since Monday. That's not like you. She's concerned, and she says you won't talk to her. Did something happen?”

“Yeah, something happened.”

Yutaka waited for Takanori to continue. Several minutes passed before Yutaka realised that Takanori wasn't going to. “Tell me about it. Maybe I can help.”

“You can't.”

“You never know until you try.”

Takanori rolled over so he was facing Yutaka, looking more than a little aggravated, but Yutaka didn't let it phase him. “I went to a party at Kouyou's place this Friday.”

Yutaka visibly stiffened at the mention of Kouyou's name. “What? Why? How did you even get invited?”

“Because me and Akira are 'dating', remember? And Kouyou told him to bring me.” He took a deep breath and looked away. “Yutaka, if you want me to tell you what happened, then you need to be completely silent and just listen. Don't cut me off or ask any questions until I'm done.”

Yutaka nodded, smiling as he sat down on the edge of the futon, patting Takanori's thigh. “You can trust me.”

Takanori pursed his lips, shutting his eyes tightly. “There was alcohol there. And no scolding me, I know you're frowning, but you promised to just listen. So yeah, I had a couple of beers. Yeah, I was a little drunk. But Akira was wasted. He was completely sloshed and I made the biggest mistake I have ever made in my entire life. He said he wanted to fuck me. And I said yes.”

A tear rolled down Takanori's cheek, and Yutaka wiped it away, but he didn't say anything. He simply waited for Takanori to continue. “And it was great. I mean, obviously Akira is good at it considering how much sex he's had, but it was the best I've felt in my entire life, Yutaka. And I completely forgot that he's straight.” Takanori sobbed as he heaved his breath, lip trembling with the force of holding back his tears. “And I texted him the next day, but he didn't reply. He didn't say anything all weekend, and on Monday he just pretended that nothing had happened. He pretended he didn't know anything about it, and-” He choked back another sob. “And I kicked him in the stomach and ran home.”

Yutaka raised an eyebrow. “You kicked him?”

Takanori nodded. “And I punched him before that.”

“Taka, don't take this the wrong way but...” Yutaka rubbed the back of his neck, staring at Takanori's closed eyes. “Why are you so upset about it?”

A few broken sobs left Takanori, and more tears rolled down his cheeks. Yutaka instantly embraced him tightly, and Takanori clung to him like a teddy. He buried his face in Yutaka's chest and cried for several long minutes, before he lay back down and wiped his tears. “I don't know.”

Yutaka frowned. “Taka, I need you to be honest with yourself here. First of all, you had sex with him. Then, you're upset that he doesn't text you back.” He watched Takanori's face carefully, knowing he was treading in dangerous waters, and that if Takanori was in denial, he would probably snap at him for what he was about to ask. “Are you in love with him?”

That only prompted another round of tears, and Takanori hugged his duvet tightly. “I'm an idiot, Yutaka.” He managed to croak out between sobs. “I fell for a straight guy.”

“Taka, remember that time when we were young and I told you you wouldn't know obvious if it bit you in the butt?”

“Your point being?”

Yutaka pinched Takanori's ass, almost laughing at the pathetic yelp that followed. “That was it.”

“What the hell was that for?” Takanori rubbed his ass and pouted dramatically.

“He had sex with you, Taka. He defends you. He kisses you of his own free will.”

“What does that have to do with anything?”

“Have you considered that maybe he's in love with you?”

Takanori snorted, burying his face in his pillow again. “Yeah, right. He's straight, remember.”

Yutaka gave him a pitiful look. Takanori could feel it. “It's not like he's ever had any other options.”

“You don't choose your sexuality.”

“I wish.” Yutaka giggled, but they both knew it was strained. “Think about it. He grew up with friends and family who encouraged him to get girlfriends, to get laid.”

“So did we.”

“And we realised, at some point, that we're not straight. We like guys. Some people take longer than others. Some have to actually fall in love before they realise it. And some people, believe it or not, are bisexual.”

Takanori rolled his eyes. “I know what bisexuality is.”

“Then when are you going to stop being in denial? Have you seen the way he looks at you? Taka, he loves you.”

A small tear rolled down Takanori's cheek. “Don't get my hopes up.”

“He loves you.”

“That's a lie and you know it.”

“He loves you.”

“Well then he can damn well come and tell me that himself!” Takanori didn't care that he was screaming. He knew his mother was most likely eavesdropping on the other side of the door, but he didn't care. All he cared about was making his heart stop hurting so much every time he thought about Akira.

“Taka.” Yutaka smiled genuinely, and Takanori was almost blinded by the shine of it.

“What?” Takanori snapped, going back to glaring at the wall.

“You love him.”

He didn't argue. He had just screamed, it was pointless to argue, so he settled for sarcasm in stead.

“Stop stating the obvious.”

~

_03/04, 11:09_  
Meet me outside, front of the gates. Now.  
Yutaka 

That was the text Akira had received five minutes ago. He had excused himself and left the cafeteria, heading to the front of the school. It was raining, and he spotted Yutaka standing by the gates, holding an umbrella. “Hey, Yutaka, what's up? It's Friday, shouldn't you be at school?”

Yutaka clenched his fist, glaring harshly at Akira. “I really ought to punch you, but it seems Taka took care of that himself.”

Akira's hand reflectively went up to his jaw, and he hissed as he touched the sore bruise. “You could say that.”

“You do realise he has been lying in his bed, crying, since Monday?”

Akira turned his head away in shame. “I figured.”

“You need to talk to him.”

“No way!” Akira looked up, and the sheer desperation in his eyes startled Yutaka.

“I already tried. He won't listen to me. He's... broken.” Yutaka had to bite his lip to keep from saying anything more.

“I don't care. Go home.” Akira was about to turn around and go back inside when Yutaka suddenly gripped his shirt, pulling him back to face him. Dark eyes bore into Akira's own, and he had never thought he would see Yutaka look so furious.

“No, listen to me, dickhead! Takanori has been crying for days, and if you don't go talk to him, he will lock himself in his room until school ends and you graduate. You have to fix what you fucked up.”

They stood silently for a long minute after that, Akira still in shock after Yutaka's outburst, and Yutaka trying to calm himself down. The patter of rain on the umbrella was disturbingly loud over the silence. “Well, what do you expect me to do? I don't think he'll be overly happy to see me, if he even lets me inside at all.”

“You ask his teacher for his books, saying that you have to deliver them so he can do his homework. Then you go and give them to Taka.”

Akira nodded. “Okay.”

“Promise me that no matter what he says or does, you'll talk to him.”

He looked at the ground, biting his lip. “I promise.”

With that, Yutaka let go of Akira's shirt and left. Akira stared after him for a long time before heading back inside the school.


	12. Chapter 12

Akira was sitting on the bus, Takanori's books in his lap and his backpack on the seat next to him as he stared at the raindrops trickling down the window. He was trying to think of something to say to Takanori, but he was completely blank. He realised that he had screwed up big time, and Yutaka was right. He had to fix this.

He took a deep breath and decided to start from the beginning again. What was the issue? What was Takanori so upset about? He had accused Akira of playing with his feelings. That was the first thing that came to mind, but something about that seemed off. How could Akira play with something that wasn't there? He couldn't, which meant that there had to be some feelings present for Akira to be able to hurt them.

That thought hit him like a freight train and he sat, dumbstruck, nearly missing his stop before he remembered himself and dashed out into the rain. He stood frozen to the spot for several long minutes as his brain tried to process this new discovery.

Takanori had feelings for him. Whether sexual, friendly, romantic or otherwise, Takanori had feelings for Akira beyond the annoyance and repulsion he made sure to make painfully apparent to Akira whenever they were together. It was only logical. Takanori was upset about Akira playing with his feelings. He wouldn't be so upset if he simply hated Akira. That didn't make any sense.

Thus, Akira started trotting towards Takanori's house, books in his hands and a smile on his face. Why his sudden realisation had made him this happy, he wasn't sure, but the point was that he was happy.

Which only made him all the more furious when, after being let inside by Takanori's mother and telling her that he had to deliver Takanori's books, he knocked on the door and received an annoyed growl in response, followed by a yell of “Go away!”

“No.” Akira slammed the door open, determined to not let Takanori throw him off, dropping his backpack and Takanori's books on the ground.

Takanori looked up from his pillow, eyes widening in shock as he saw who it was. His expression quickly warped into one of malice, and he snarled out his next words. “Get the fuck out of my house before I castrate you.”

“No. And calm down. No need to scare your mother.” Akira sat down on the floor, as far away from the futon as he could. He met Takanori's glare, slightly taken aback by how exhausted he looked. His eyes were red from crying, and Akira turned away, not wanting to see Takanori so sad, especially considering it was his fault. “I brought your books so you can do your homework.”

Takanori glared at the pile of books, then back at Akira. “Good. Now go away.”

“We need to talk.”

“No, we don't. Get out of my room.”

“Will you just listen to me for a second?” Akira tried not to yell. He had come here to apologise, after all, and yelling would probably just infuriate Takanori even more. “I didn't know you had feelings for me.”

“What makes you think I do?”

“On Monday you screamed at me not to play with your feelings, and then you punched me in the face. So obviously, you have feelings, and I've hurt them.”

“Come here to laugh at me? Go ahead, spit in my face and tell me how pathetic and miserable I am, falling for a straight guy.”

“Why do you think I'm such a bad guy?” Akira's voice was quiet, and Takanori narrowed his eyes.

“Oh no, don't try to turn this around. You're not the one suffering, Suzuki. You've had it easy. You and your friends who bully juniors for lunch money, who are the kings of the school and can get as much pussy as you want. I'm the one who lost my father, got bullied and beat up because of who I am. And now you're exploiting that, thinking you can fool around with me just to break my heart.” He took a few shallow breaths to calm himself, his eyes clenching shut in pain, and his next words were spoken so low Akira wasn't even sure he'd spoken at first. “I'm not a toy that you can play with and then throw away when you break it.”

“I'm sorry. I'm sorry all that happened to you, but you know what, Takanori? You're not the only one who's had it hard.”

“Oh, boohoo, if you fail your parents are going to throw you out, it must be so horrible being you.”

Akira just stared at the floor, lost in thought, ignoring the spiteful look Takanori was sending him. “I just found out that my father beats up my mother whenever he's upset. Which, when I think about it, explains all the weekends my mum chased me away from home and I had to stay the night at either Yuu or Kouyou's place. Growing up, I thought it was just because she didn't like me.”

“If you think I'm going to take pity on you just because you have shit parents, you're dead wrong.”

“I didn't say that.” They were both silent for a long while, Takanori repeatedly biting his lip and Akira picking at some lint on his sock. Finally, Akira managed to clear his head of all the doubts he had about his father, shaking his head and looking up at Takanori. “I didn't mean to break your heart.”

“Fuck you.” Takanori turned around and stared harshly at the wall. “Fuck you.”

“Will you believe me if I tell you I don't remember anything from that night?” When he didn't receive a reply or a shake of the head, he continued. “I must have been completely hammered, because I can't remember shit. The last thing I remember is sitting on the couch, and then you asking me to show you the bathroom. From then on, it's all blank. And I know that's not an excuse, but you know what? I didn't know you had feelings for me. I didn't even consider it. All this time, you have been treating me like I'm the most worthless little cockroach in the world. I sincerely thought you hated me. And honestly, can you blame me?”

Takanori snorted, but he didn't say anything. Akira decided to continue. “I never meant to play with your heart. I just wanted to pass maths. I'm sorry for whatever I did, because I can't really remember any of it. But believe me when I say that I never wanted to hurt you.”

“Why?” Takanori's voice trembled, and he held his breath to stop the sobs that threatened to escape his raw throat. “Why do you care?”

And with that, everything fell into place. Suddenly, it all made sense. In that small moment of clarity, Akira realised why he had bothered to come all this way just to talk to Takanori. It made sense that he wanted to protect him. It made sense that he had felt so lonely and empty without Takanori there all week. His head fell limp and he shook it in irony as tears of his own trailed down his face.

“Because I love you.”

“I told you, Akira, don't play with me.”

He ignored the tremble of Takanori's voice, slowly getting up off the floor and crawling over to the futon. He sat down behind Takanori, pulling him up into a sitting position and wrapping his arms around him. He shrugged off Takanori's attempts to free himself, holding him tight against his chest and smiling as tears poured down his face. “I love you, Takanori.”

“Don't.” Takanori clenched his eyes shut in a desperate attempt to hold back the tears, and Akira leaned down to kiss his shoulder, moving on to his neck. “If you say that, I might believe you.”

Akira laughed, burying his face in the nape of Takanori's neck, knowing that Takanori could probably feel the wetness of his tears, but he didn't care. All he cared about was revelling in the scent of Takanori's skin, hugging the frail body close as it trembled and shook with sobs. “I love you more than the world, Takanori.”

“I love you too.” Takanori turned around slightly, looking at Akira with wet eyes as he smiled, a chuckle escaping him at the absurdity of the situation. “I love you so much.”

Akira wiped a few tears off Takanori's face, leaning down to press his lips softly to Takanori's trembling ones, red and sore from having been bitten so much. Both of them closed their eyes as they sat there for the longest moment, enjoying the warmth of each other's bodies. Then Akira pulled Takanori closer, clasping his teeth over Takanori's bottom lip repeatedly. He ran his tongue along the plump flesh, tauntingly poking the tip just inside Takanori's mouth before pulling back, grinning.

“You tease.” Takanori pouted, pushing Akira onto the mattress, surprised that Akira let him.

“Oh, I am? We had sex and you're the only one who can remember it. Now that's unfair.” Takanori laughed, and Akira flicked his forehead, faking an annoyed glare. “Was it good?”

“Judging by the sound of your moans, my ass must be heaven.” Takanori winked, leaning down to kiss Akira's stomach. When he tried to move his head to look up, however, Akira pushed him further down. Takanori was confused for a second, until he noticed the tent in Akira's trousers, and he laughed. “You love me that much?”

“Please,” Akira panted, slightly breathless just at the sight of Takanori, so alluring and sexy. He had never known a man could look so hot before. “If you- want to, I mean, you don't have to-”

“I want to.” Takanori looked up at Akira, licking his lips as he started to unfasten Akira's belt. He smirked as he grabbed the hem of Akira's trousers, pulling them off him and throwing them on the floor. His boxers followed suit, his cock springing free as Takanori slid his underwear off. He hesitated for a second, looking at Akira's dick and pursing his lips.“This is my first time, so don't expect me to be as good as all the sluts you've fucked previously.”

He licked the side of Akira's cock slowly, running his tongue flat up the length a few times to get accustomed to the taste. He kissed the head of it before taking a deep breath, wrapping his lips around the tip. Akira gasped, tangling his hand in Takanori's hair, and Takanori responded with a moan, closing his eyes and taking a few more centimetres, running his tongue over the head.

Akira propped himself up on his free arm, ignoring his urge to fall back on the futon and thrust his hips up into Takanori's mouth. It was weird, having another guy suck him off, but the harder Takanori sucked, the less Akira cared. It wasn't any different from when a girl did it, except that Takanori didn't make as much noise, which Akira didn't mind at all. He watched his cock disappear between Takanori's lips as he started bobbing his head, running his hands through Takanori's hair and loving the concentrated look on his face as he focused on pleasuring Akira.

Takanori reached up to stroke the base of Akira's cock with one hand, unable to fit it all in his mouth. He heard Akira's moans and grunts above him, and felt his heart skip a beat at the fact that he was making Akira feel good. He sucked harder, moved his head faster, until Akira's cock exploded in his mouth. He nearly coughed as Akira's sperm filled his mouth quickly, swallowing several times and letting Akira's dick slip from his mouth as he sat up on his knees.

“Fuck, Takanori, that was good.” Akira panted heavily, wiping the sweat off his forehead.

“Really? Thanks.” Takanori smiled, brushing his hair behind his ear and licking his lips mischievously. “I will get better with practice.”

As Akira regained his ability to move, he threw off his shirt, leaning over to help Takanori with his. They shared several long kisses before Takanori lay down on the futon, starting to unbuckle his belt. “I don't have a condom.”

“I always have a few spares in my backpack.”

Takanori stared at him in disbelief, before shaking his head and laughing as he pulled off his trousers. “You're unbelievable.”

“Maybe, but I'm prepared.” Akira grinned and helped Takanori get off the last of his clothes, leaning over to kiss him, but was stopped by a hand on his chest. Akira's mouth fell open as Takanori rolled over onto his stomach, bending his knees under him and wriggling his ass.

“Come on.” Takanori looked over his shoulder, licking his lips and raising a challenging eyebrow at Akira, who was just gaping at him. “What are you waiting for?”

Akira leaned forward to kiss Takanori's ass, sucking on three of his fingers to wet them as much as he could. “I love you.” He prodded Takanori's hole with his index finger, prompting him to relax as he slowly pushed it inside. Takanori let out a small gasp, burying his face in the mattress as Akira added another finger, spreading them slightly to stretch Takanori's ass.

Takanori whimpered as Akira pushed his third finger inside, turning his head to breathe properly as he tried to relax his muscles. The stretch was almost too much for him, but Akira took his time, prepping him slowly, and it hurt less with every thrust. Then Akira accidentally brushed the tips of his fingers over his prostate, and Takanori moaned loudly. “Just fuck me already.”

Akira smirked and pulled out his fingers, getting up to fetch a condom from his backpack. “Demanding.” He pressed a kiss to Takanori's thigh, opening the wrapper and rolling the condom on his dick. He positioned the tip at Takanori's entrance, pushing in slowly, groaning as Takanori clenched his ass around him. “Fuck, you're tight.”

“And you're huge,” Takanori mumbled, pushing his ass back to try get Akira deeper. “But never mind that. The sooner you start to fuck me, the sooner it will feel better.”

Akira chuckled breathlessly, grabbing Takanori's hips and holding him still. He loved the sight of Takanori underneath him, trembling slightly and gripping the sheets as he struggled to breathe. “Ask me nicely.”

“Fuck's sake, Suzuki, if you don't start to move, I'll just kick you out and jerk off myself!”

Akira laughed, pulling out and thrusting into Takanori's ass with a low moan. He pulled Takanori's hips back to meet his thrusts as he started fucking him, snapping his hips forward as he threw his head back and groaned.

“Harder,” Takanori moaned, burying his face in the sheets again to muffle his pleasured cries, rocking back and forth and desperately trying to keep his balance as Akira fucked him faster, his balls slapping against Takanori's ass.

“I love you,” Akira repeated, planting his hands on either side of Takanori's head, kissing his spine. “I love you so much.”

Takanori grunted in response. “Shut up and fuck me.”

Grinning, Akira leaned his weight forward and pounded into Takanori's ass, losing himself in the sound of Takanori's moans. As Takanori's hand grabbed his own and held on for dear life, Akira realised with a smile that this was the first time he actually made love to someone. He had fucked plenty of chicks before, but this time was different, not because Takanori was a guy, but because he loved him.

Akira wrapped a hand around Takanori's dick, stroking him in time with his thrusts. It didn't take long before Takanori gasped and squirmed under him, screaming into the futon as he came. Akira milked his dick for every last drop while he continued to thrust into him, grunting as Takanori's ass clenched around his cock in time with his spasms. His hips jerked erratically before he stilled entirely, groaning and falling onto the bed next to Takanori.

Takanori chuckled and pulled the condom off Akira, getting up to throw it into the trash bin. He crawled on top of Akira, pecking his lips sweetly before resting his head on his chest. “So, still going to argue that you're straight?”

Akira laughed and rolled them over, tickling Takanori's sides until he was nearly dying from laughter. “Fuck you.”

“You already did.”

They were interrupted by a knock on the door, Takanori's mother clearing her throat. “Um, boys? I made dinner, if you... have some time.”

They both burst out laughing, Takanori burying his face in the pillow and groaning in shame. “Oh god, I forgot she was home. Think she heard us?”

“Duh.” Akira grinned and pinched Takanori's hip. “I'm sure she'll just be glad that I got you in a good mood again.”

“She'll be happy as long as I drag my ass to school on Monday.”

“If you can even move your ass by then.”

“Fuck you.” Takanori smiled, swatting Akira's shoulder playfully.

“That was the plan.”

~

Akira had gone back home on Saturday to get some clothes, returning to stay with Takanori the rest of the weekend. When Monday arrived, they got on the bus, both happy and sated after a weekend of cuddling and fooling around. When they were almost there, Takanori rested his head on Akira's shoulder and sighed. “You know, you could have answered my text.”

“What text?” Akira raised an eyebrow, and Takanori rolled his eyes.

“The one I sent you after the party.”

“I didn't get any text. Are you sure you sent it?”

“Positive.” Takanori looked utterly confused, brows furrowing as he fished out his phone, showing Akira the text in question. “It was one of the reasons I was so pissed.”

Akira frowned as he read the message. “I never got that.” Then realisation dawned on him, and he clenched his fists, feeling positively murderous. “Actually, Saturday morning my phone wasn't in my pocket. Kouyou had it.”

Takanori's expression went from confusion to fury as he caught up. “Well, that would explain a lot of things. For example, why he had my number.”

“He texted you?”

Takanori nodded, showing him the message Kouyou had sent. As Akira read it, he felt himself seething. “Well, that fuckhead sure has a couple of things to explain.”

As if on cue, the bus announced that the next stop was the school, and Akira looked out the window to spot Kouyou's car pulling up to the sidewalk. Before Takanori had the time to say anything, Akira sprinted off the bus, launching himself at Kouyou and punching him in the face as hard as he could.

The punch caught Kouyou off guard, but not as much as the realisation of who had thrown it. He stared at Akira with utter disbelief on his face, bringing his hand up to his nose, his eyes glinting dangerously as he discovered that he was bleeding. “There better be a good fucking explanation for this, Aki.”

“You took my phone. You texted Takanori. You knew we had sex and you didn't even tell me.” Akira was twice as pissed as Kouyou, and he suspected the sole reason he hadn't already been thrown to the ground was that Kouyou could tell.

“You fucked a faggot, Aki! What did you want me to do? I had to try and fix the mess before-”

Akira cut off Kouyou mid-sentence with a knee that connected to his groin, making Kouyou scream and stumble to the ground as he held his crotch, tears streaming from his eyes. Already, a small crowd was gathering around them. “Fuck you, Kou. I thought you were my friend.” He was about to turn around and leave when Kouyou's shrill laugh reached his ears.

“So it's true, huh. They really do turn you. Fuck, I'm probably contaminated already.”

“The only thing you'll risk catching from me is a brain cell, and wouldn't that be too bad. If you had one you might realise what a dumb fucker you are.” Punching him one last time for good measure, Akira started walking back towards the school, but Kouyou yelled after him, desperation evident in his voice.

“The only reason you and Matsumoto had sex in the first place was because I slipped roofies into your beer!” Kouyou coughed, a gob of blood and spit landing on the ground in front of him. “Now that I googled it, things make sense. Did you know they're commonly called the date rape drug? So who raped who, eh, Aki? You? Or him?”

Akira turned around to gawk at Kouyou. His stomach twisted, and he felt nauseated all of a sudden. Rohypnol. That explained why he couldn't remember anything from the night. “Are you really that shit of a friend?”

“I'm not friends with faggots who betray their bros for a fucking fairy!”

Akira was about to go back and punch him, but he was beat to it. Takanori had finally managed to drag his and Akira's backpack off the bus, and threw them off his shoulder as he dashed to Kouyou and leaped on top of him. He knocked the back of Kouyou's head into the pavement, raising his fist and slamming it into Kouyou's face over and over again until his knuckles were scraped and Kouyou was nearly unconscious. He didn't stop until Yuu showed up, scrambling out of his car to pull a furious Takanori off Kouyou.

“What the fuck is going on?!” He yelped as Takanori bit his hand, letting go of him and running over to Kouyou, bending over him and checking if he was breathing. Kouyou slapped his hand away weakly and coughed, trying to get up but falling back down immediately.

“Please tell me you weren't in on this, Yuu.” Akira had walked over to them now, tilting his head and staring at Yuu forlornly.

Yuu turned to glare angrily at both Akira and Takanori, then back to Kouyou. He seemed to have a problem choosing sides, but then a choked growl came from Kouyou, and Yuu got to his feet, clenching his fists. “Whatever Kou did, I support him. Because friends are supposed to stick together. What happened to that, Akira?”

“Your definition of friendship is obviously different from mine.” Akira took a step forward, pretending to punch Yuu in the face, waiting until Yuu's hands flew up in front of his eyes in defence before he kicked Yuu's legs out under him, kicking him hard in the stomach.

Akira turned around, shocked, as he hear the echo of clapping. A circle of students had gathered around them, and they were clapping and whooping, cheering Akira's name, and he smiled as he realised that Yuu and Kouyou was disliked by the entire school. They had ruled entirely through fear, and now that it had been proven that they weren't invincible, their kingdom fell apart and crumbled into ash.

“Okay bitches, listen up.” Takanori grabbed Akira's arm, smirking triumphantly as he laced his fingers with Akira's. “Suzuki Akira belongs to me. I as much as hear about one of you whores flirting with him, and I will rip your heads off, got it?”

A long silence ensued, and Akira laughed, kissing the tip of Takanori's nose. “You're such a dork.” He started walking towards the school, hand in hand with Takanori.

“I'm dating the school's hottest guy. I'm allowed to brag.”

Akira did pass maths that year. He graduated, just barely, but he graduated. Even so, his parents kicked him out of school long before the final grades were set. As soon as they heard (from either Kouyou or Yuu's parents, Akira suspected) that Akira was gay and had a boyfriend, they threw him out on his ass the very same day, but Akira didn't really mind. He moved in with Takanori and his mother, and when autumn came and Takanori started his final year, Akira got a job. He wanted to help support them financially, and wait another year before going to college, so he and Takanori could be in the same class, and hopefully share a dorm.

Suzuki Akira was the luckiest guy in the world.

And finally, he was starting to believe that himself.


End file.
